Let’s dish

Posted by Dalene | September 22, 2008 | 32 Comments

Today’s two-part discussion for Ask Nine Women comes from another anonymous reader (or two). But it could have come from anyone. Isn’t that the beauty of it?

My mother would probably be horrified, but when I think back on the family dinners I knew as a child, I remember one pound of ground beef magnified to the power of 8 by some protein enhancement that looked and tasted not unlike All-Bran. I recall the nights when one box of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese somehow doubled as dinner for seven with the help of sumptuous stir ins of peas and/or sliced hot dogs. And who can forget how the sickly sweet taste of powdered milk can turn one gallon of milk into two? The irony is that we lived on a farm complete with a dairy and beef cow or two, so we shouldn’t have been wanting for milk or meat.

Nevertheless, I remain impressed by my mother’s skill in managing two amazing feats: 1). Despite an often-meager budget, my mom never sent anyone away hungry and 2). Even with six kids she usually managed to get all of us to the table at the same time.

So here are today’s topics:

I. In this day and age a trip to the grocery store can run me more than a month’s utilities and prices continue to rise (over 6% in ‘07 and expected to top another 6% this year).

How do you do manage to feed the same number (or more) people while your grocery dollar buys you significantly less? Please share any tips you have for stretching your grocery dollar or taking food for two or four and doubling your assets.

II. Despite being an advocate of not over scheduling children (or myself for that matter), I am lucky if more than half of us are same place at one time for family dinner. I really loved this Slate article which I’ve renamed, “Family: It’s what’s for dinner.”

What do you think? What are some of your own successes and struggles with family dinner. (Please tell me I’m not the only one occasionally serving breakfast cereal for dinner at 8:30 at night.)

Want to bring something to the table to discuss? Suggest topics via e-mail to askninewomenATgmailDOTcom. Submissions are chosen at random.

Category: Ask Nine Women

Comments

32 Responses to “Let’s dish”

MaryC
September 22nd, 2008 @ 5:53 pm

I guess having only 2 little ones (ages 2 and 3) who don’t eat much helps stretch the dollar. They are so suspicious of food not made of pb&j, it’s like they think I’m trying to feed them poison! So our struggles with family dinner is that they are a total workout to try to get our kids to eat. We become cheerleaders, chanting names, seeing who can be the “leader” and take a bite, bargaining, and whatever else might work. It’s exhausting and I admit that there have been many a Sunday dinner that my hubby and I eat alone first, and then interrupt the kids playing to feed them after, just so we can relax a little after a long, stressful church day (primary pres = me).

My latest money-saving trick is to buy whole chickens from Sam’s for 78 cents a pound, freeze one for later and cook one up and make it into several casseroles or salads or tacos or whatever else I might need chicken in during the week. It’s really really tasty and much cheaper than buying boneless skinless chicken breasts. We also have a lot of meatless meals – dried beans in a crockpot make the best burritos, and pasta is always tasty and cheap.
wendy
September 22nd, 2008 @ 6:02 pm

GREAT subject! I never loved the powdered milk mixed in–ugh! But I did really love Mac & cheese & weenies & corn, and our special add-in, tomato soup (still-do, but dh won’t have it).

When I was more on top of things, I clipped coupons. We don’t do a lot of major brands or processed foods, so I never thought it would be worth it to do so, but I was wrong. I was surprised at how often the sale price combined with coupon price made it possible to buy some of the name brands I actually prefer for pennies. And I was also surprised by the variety of things coupons covered. Sometimes it’s possible to get things for free with sale + coupon. There are often coupons for free things as a promotional for new candies or beverages that I loved to treat myself with.

There are many web sites that make it easier, too. The one I’m most familiar with is http://www.pinchingyourpennies.com (for Utah). This site and others feature lists from all the local stores of what’s on sale, if there are any coupons, when the coupons came out, and the price before and after coupons.

Savvy Shopper is another site, but his focus is on planning your menu around the sales, and I wouldn’t eat much of what he “puts together”-too much processed.

Some drawbacks to those methods are the time involved, and having to make trips to multiple stores. Sometimes it’s not worth it, but I know families who save $100s of dollars every month this way.

Only buying things when they are on sale has meant not having beef or chicken for a few weeks, if we run out before the next good sale hits. That’s no huge sacrifice. Meatless tacos and spaghetti sauce are still good.

I think I would also say, we sacrifice some of our favorites for the sake of staying within a budget. I have been surprised when I hear people buying certain kinds of expensive cheeses, salad dressings, etc., and know their budget it tight. Sometimes we “deserve” to splurge and eat what we really love, and sometimes it’s just better to not indulge in the fancier foods for the sake of a budget. We don’t seem to feel deprived for it.

Two last things . . . http://www.savingdinner.com/ has some recipes available for free that are supposed to be penny-saving and healthy. We’ve been happy with those we’ve tried. And, http://www.flylady.net has, among other things, some mix recipes that are also good, like taco seasoning mix. I think it’s cheaper to do it that way.

We’re not tackling the dinner together problem just yet, so no input there. I’m looking forward to hearing more ideas!
Geo
September 22nd, 2008 @ 6:32 pm

Since it’s just two of us at my house, I’m not really qualified to ramble on this topic, but I will say that building meals around grains and beans instead of meat makes our food money stretch farther. When I was more in a habit of using dried beans rather than canned, that stretched it even more. And I would prefer beans and rice 100 times out of 100 over TVP!
eljee
September 22nd, 2008 @ 8:24 pm

I’ve struggled with shopping, meal-planning, and cooking for years. I would do really well for awhile, and then burn out and give up yet again. Last year I started using online menu-planning services like http://www.savingdinner.com and http://www.thescramble.com . However, my food bill was huge. At the time, I stayed with it, because spending more on food was better than eating tacos, hot dogs, and mac-n-cheese with tuna mixed in all the time. But this spring, I found out about a service here in Utah, http://www.myfoodstoragedeals.com . This is a menu-planning service that works around what’s on sale every week. My family, including my picky-eater ds, has loved the food! One thing I wish is that this was available in other states. We are probably moving out of Utah in the next year or so, and I will not be looking forward to having to plan my own menus again. In addition, this site tells you what are the best deal of the week, how much you need of each item to have a years’ supply, etc. My food storage has more than doubled in the 3 months I’ve been using this, and I’m not spending too much more money.

Other things I’ve been doing lately to save money: buying lettuce instead of bagged salad and not serving milk with meals. (There are more, but I can’t think of them right now. Basically, I’m trying to cut down the number of convenience foods I use.) I usually cut the meat in a recipe by about half if it’s a casserole.

Eating together isn’t really a challenge yet. I wish I could get dinner on the table earlier, but I’ve decided to accept the fact that I can’t get much done until dh gets home to help with the kids, so we’ll just have to be content with eating later.
lee
September 22nd, 2008 @ 8:57 pm

My family’s favorite cheap delight: Baked potatoes with all sorts of toppings (can even use leftovers as toppings).

Our favorite cheapo snack is popcorn, (popped ourselves not microwave bags).

Our cheap dessert is snow cones made at home with a snow cone maker from Walmart. Ice, its lots cheaper than ice cream.
Dalene
September 22nd, 2008 @ 9:02 pm

Lee’s comment about leftovers just reminded me of a friend of mine who was telling me how her mother (she comes from a family with 10 children–or more…I lose track) used to huge batches of bread (and other bread-like items) every week and toss in any leftovers in the fridge that they hadn’t already reheated and eaten. She told me that one week the leftovers happened to be green. And so the bread ended up being green. The bread. The hamburger buns. Probably even some cinnamon rolls.

Yeah, I don’t know how good I’ve got it.
Kathy
September 22nd, 2008 @ 11:35 pm

You are not the only one serving cold cereal for dinner. That is exactly what all 7 of us ate for dinner last night. I haven’t figured out how to stay on top of the groceries. I have 4 growing boys who have hollow legs. As far as activities, we have cut back to one sport and one music lesson each — still times 5 this will prove to be a challenge. Thankfully the 2 year old doesn’t start anything for another 3 years or so. I am looking forward to everyone’s tips!
Dalene
September 23rd, 2008 @ 6:09 am

My mom used to make something she called Silly Supper, which was just breakfast food for dinner–waffles, scrambled eggs, or whatever. I remember as a kid thinking it was great fun, but I don’t think my kids see Rice Krispies for dinner in quite the same light.
rebecca
September 23rd, 2008 @ 9:07 am

We do “breakfast for dinner” here too.

For awhile I would put leftovers in a freezer container (a little bit of each… a la TV dinner). When we had a few piled up we had Suprise Supper…. we each chose a container, microwaved it and that is what they got! It was easier when they were little…. now they are older they don’t go for it quite as much.

Mostly I try to plan several meals around one “prep”. If I bake a ham, we have ham and potatoes, then use more ham later in the week for soup or casserole…

The other thing I have finally started doing was realizing that we really didn’t eat all our leftovers. I started making our dinners the regular way (we have 6 in our family) and then taking half and putting it in the freezer. I have found that our family doesn’t EAT a full batch of burritos or casserole, so a slightly smaller meals gets saved and popped in later and it is TOTALLY working. We have less waste, fewer leftovers and a smaller food bill…
elizabeth-w
September 23rd, 2008 @ 10:31 am

Would anyone be willing to share how much they spend on food in a month? I don’t know if I’m doing a good job or not. In my family there are 4 of us–two grownups and an 8 year old and a 5 year old.
In my budget, for a month is 525$. That includes all paper products, hygiene items, hose, underwear (think stuff you can get at walmart). Does that seem exorbitant or pretty decent? If someone writes theirs is half that for the same # of folks, say what you do/what you eat, please! Or maybe what you don’t eat…
I don’t live in Utah, but I’m guessing our food costs at the store are comparable. Oh, I should say that I go shopping on Mondays. So the 500 figure is based on a 5 monday month–if there were 4 mondays the grocery bill would be closer to 425.
Justine
September 23rd, 2008 @ 11:38 am

Elizabeth-W, when I’m being really conscientious, I feed our family of 7 on $600. Most months, however, it’s closer to $800. So you’re not off at all! The only thing that really works for me is when I am very strict with myself about grocery store visits. I went for almost a whole year only going to the grocery store every two weeks. It was hard at first, but was shocked at how much we saved.

I planned my meals around what had the shortest shelf life, and wouldn’t allow myself, under any circumstances, to hit the store before my two weeks were up. We saved a TON of money just doing that one thing.
courtney
September 23rd, 2008 @ 11:52 am

In order to save more money, we have cut a lot of things out of our typical grocery list: ice cream, soda, sugared cereal, etc. And, who would have guessed, we’ve lost weight in the process! We weren’t super unhealthy, but just liked some treats and comfort items.
I am trying to base more of my meals around vegetables and grains for health and budget reasons, but it’s hard! It’s so much easier to buy processed, pre-packaged food and to cook with meat. Even though produce is very expensive, I’ve noticed my grocery bill go down when the bulk of my list is produce as opposed to a billion packaged things. I’ve had to make a good, solid meal plan before grocery shopping, otherwise I end up just buying all sorts of random stuff.
Tiffany
September 23rd, 2008 @ 1:47 pm

I can stretch meat like crazy. A roast will feed our family on Sunday (2 adults, 4 kids) then serve for 3 or 4 additional meals. I make a lot of soups and this stretches out the veggies and meat.

I make a lot of bread. Dh has been making pancakes for breakfast from scratch. And we only have cereal a couple days a week.

I also don’t cook from a recipe very often because I find I do better just using what we have and being creative rather than creating a shopping list based on an elaborate menu.

dh and I eat leftovers for lunch.
FoxyJ
September 23rd, 2008 @ 2:05 pm

There are only 4 of us: two parents and two small kids (5 and 2). I spend between $250 and $300 a month for groceries–that generally doesn’t include toiletries or paper goods. We have mostly cut out meat, so that saves a lot of money. One of our biggest expenses is cereal; my kids will only eat cold cereal, and so will my husband. I love oatmeal, but I can’t get any of them to eat it, so I usually eat oatmeal by myself. I’m too lazy to cook a big breakfast, but we generally have “breakfast for dinner” once a week. The way I shop is by looking for the special deals each week and stocking up on them. Each store usually has just a few items that are heavily discounted, so I buy a bunch. Then I plan my meals around whatever fresh veggies and fruits are on sale that week, so most of my grocery list each week is fresh veggies and dairy products. For example, last month they had large bags of shredded cheese deeply discounted. So I bought five bags and stuck them in the freezer. I haven’t had to buy shredded cheese for over a month. Yesterday I picked up five 5-pound bags of flour for $1.50 each (a great price here). Things like that. I actually limit my Costco trips to once every month or so, since I’ve found that many things are actually cheaper when they’re on sale at the grocery store. I try and keep track of what the regular price is so I don’t get fooled by sales that are only really $.20 off instead of 1 or 2 dollars. We also don’t buy snack foods (chips, cookies, soda) and I make a lot of my own salad dressings and sauces.
FoxyJ
September 23rd, 2008 @ 2:06 pm

Oh, and we eat leftovers for lunch (dh works from home), so I think it helps that we don’t cook lunch or have to pack lunches for people. I also do the thing where I freeze part of a meal and eat it again in a week or two. A pound of beans in the crockpot is cheap and yummy, but after a few days we get sick of it. So half goes in the freezer and reappears in a few days.
Angie
September 23rd, 2008 @ 2:54 pm

I have a family of 8. I spend 300-400 per month, but that doesn’t include food out of our food storage, which I rotate in alot. We eat a ton of whole grains and legumes. I bake bread, make tortillas, etc. We only eat cereal once a week, and i just found a recipe for making that, so if it works well I may not be buying that much anymore either. We also just bought a property with fruit trees, garden space, and room for animals, so I’m hoping to bring our expenses down further. I have a friend with a similar size family who only spends $100 per month. She raises her own meat, makes her juice, milks her cow, etc. That’s pretty extreme, though. In general we shop once a month at a discount store, and I buy large quantities when there are sales. I cook from scratch and don’t buy much processed food, which is where it gets expensive.
elizabeth-w
September 23rd, 2008 @ 4:08 pm

Okay, Justine says I’m ok, but everyone else spends waay less. We eat little meat (see the veggiemos blogspot blog).
I hate running from store to store. I shop at walmart one week and the next week at a bag-your-own grocery store that has better prices on produce. I have been to Costco once and never went back. We just don’t seem to have enough people to warrant going there, but if someone can tell me that I’m off track about that I would love to hear it.
Justine, my mom goes once a month! I couldn’t do that–I mean, she’d make little trips for bananas or whatever, but I don’t think I could do that. Twice a month maybe… I already plan a weekly menu, and two nights are leftovers of whatever.
Sorry if I’m taking over the post, but seeing how little others spend is really agitating me to learn how to do a better job.
Justine
September 23rd, 2008 @ 4:16 pm

Yeah, Elizabeth, now I’m starting to think I’m a lazy shopper and spent WAY TO MUCH!
dalene
September 23rd, 2008 @ 4:52 pm

Before some of you start beating yourselves up you need to remember that prices differ by location. Also, I know I spent a lot less per mouth when my kids were in elementary school than when I started feeding teenage boys. It’s hard to get a true comparison.

Has anyone tried the Grocery Guru? I’m just curious.
elizabeth-w
September 23rd, 2008 @ 5:11 pm

Dalene, you know my kids are small! The should be cheaper
tonya
September 23rd, 2008 @ 5:32 pm

You’re right Dalene! Just try feeding teenage boys! Crazy!

I have 3 girls, but there was a time I felt like I was feeding every teenager around after school. My food bill shot up to over $1000 for a few months til I laid down the law. I have told my kids and their friends that they can eat anything they find, but only ONE! They would seriously drink one water bottle after another and when they were gone they’d wonder just how to get a drink! Uh, duh, the sink… Another boy sat and ate granola bar after granola bar out of our snack drawer, right in front of me…I finally set him straight. I am now known as the food nazi. I really want to make these kids know that they are always welcome, but I’ve found tough love is the way to control the food intake around here.

Sorry, that was a weird tangent – I think I’m ok now.

Anyway, we eat alot of pasta. I have some weird meat issues – I can eat it, but I can’t prepare it. We also eat out alot (more than we should) but always use coupons. I only go to the grocery store about once a month for a big haul. Then I just run in, or make one of the kids, for milk and some fresh fruit or veggies. I am very frugal in alot of ways, so that we can eat out. That seems to be what brings us all together. Not very realistic, but with girls coming and going from all directions it’s easier to say to meet us somewhere.

When my girls were little we always ate dinner together, now I’ve got to get it when I can.
tonya
September 23rd, 2008 @ 5:36 pm

And can I just say – Angie, you are my hero.
Beth in CA
September 23rd, 2008 @ 7:45 pm

One thing I did, that requires a little time up front, but saves me big time later was going to Costco and writing down everything I buy there (sugar, flour, cereal, milk, cheese, produce) and its price. I then made a spreadsheet and figured it out by price per unit.(Price divided by ounces, pound, cartons, etc.) That way when there is a sale at other stores I can figure out quickly if that price is better than Costco. Usually its not, but every once in a while. Lately, meat prices are though. I also have a 6 week meal plan that I shop around. I keep lists of ingredients per week and then buy things when they go on sale and freeze them or whatever. It does require a little planning and time up front, but has saved us a lot of money and time in the long run. Its also great because my DH can help with dinner on nights I have church meetings – no wandering around saying “What’s for dinner?”
Angie
September 23rd, 2008 @ 10:45 pm

We actually shift the foods we eat as the month goes on. For the first week or two we live on salads and fresh fruit. Then we shift to fresh foods that last longer in the refrigerator–root vegetables and the like. By the end of the month we resort to canned and frozen. Not everyone wants to bother with that.

Eating together is a big deal to me. Many times we eat 3 meals a day as a family, almost always at least one. My kids are homeschooled, and we choose to live close to my husband’s job. It still takes some planning, though. I choose which activities the kids can do in part by how they fit with the family’s schedule as a whole, and we all shift a bit every few months because my husband’s work schedule changes several times a year.
FoxyJ
September 23rd, 2008 @ 11:54 pm

As far as Costco goes, I actually have gotten to the point where I mostly buy non-food things there like diapers, wipes, shampoo, dish detergent. It seems like I can get good quality for a good price, plus what I get lasts so long that I cut down on extra shopping trips.
Carina
September 24th, 2008 @ 10:54 am

Yeah, our family is small enough (two children, two adults) that buying produce from Costco doesn’t help our budget. I try to limit Costco items to dry goods, like diapers, TP, things I know won’t go bad. I do like their rotisserie chickens because they are big, and cheap, and can feed us for 3-4 meals.
Blue
September 24th, 2008 @ 1:29 pm

I made it through my DH’s Ph.D. working part-time and having my babies without going into debt. I credit Aldi for this feat. I seriously saved enough money by shopping there to not only avoid debt while living in Chicago, but in fact saved enough to put 20% down on our first home purchase upon his graduation. Aldi is one of the largest grocers in the world, but alas, they’re only in the midwest/eastern states of America. So lucky to those of you who live near one!

There are lots of ways to save money, and most of the obvious ones have been covered above. It is hard to compare those who live in an area with land and room for animals and a big garden to those who don’t. It’d be wrong to just calculate the hard&fast grocery bills of someone with a garden, cows, chickens etc., and compare that number with someone who is living in a different situation. You’d have to adjust for cost of the land, water, seed, fertilizer, the purchase price of the original animals, their feed and vet expenses etc., to say nothing of the time. Neither lifestyle is better/worse than the other, just different lifestyles. And I for one would love the thought of not being in a fix if there’s ever a run on the grocery stores…that’s got to feel good to be more self-sufficient. So the best I can do is try and be prepared with my years’ supply and learn to rotate the storage we have. I realized as a kid that if we had to live on our food storage I would surly die, because it contained only items that I simply wouldn’t be able to consume. I hated the whole idea of food storage as a young child, because of what I knew awaited me out in the garage should utter disaster ever strike.

As a teen, I met a family with a food storage program that included (what a concept) Foods You Would Actually Eat. And they DID eat it! They bought the stuff they used on a daily basis in case loads, and rotated through it steadily. I was an instant convert and my newest fantasy is to someday have those rolling can shelves that they sell to make using the oldest-first so much easier. Rotating it is the big barrier.

Anyway, not to be on a food storage tangent, but it’s just something that can actually reduce the food bill. I have a friend who decided to live on her storage for one month, just as a trial, to see how they did. It was like a practice run to find out what they needed to adjust in case they ever had an actual need to live on it. She realized what they needed to store more of, and what they really didn’t end up going through. Hats off to her because she was pregnant and dearly missed her fresh foods after a while (she included their garden in their consumable items).

Waste not, want not. A penny saved is a penny earned. These were my mottos as a single woman and new mom, and now that we’re living the student life again I try to keep it in the fore of my mind. Doing better one month and saving the difference makes a difference in the long run.

Thanks for all the fun ideas everyone! ♥
Lisa
September 24th, 2008 @ 4:39 pm

Elizabeth W- My grocery bill is high. I have 4 people and I shop at Costco for almost all my non food items and then a handful of foods-like some bread. I include all my toiletries, paper products, and cleaning in my grocery budget and it is higher than Justine. If I am really good about coupons and shop on Monday or Tuesday, it is way better, but I’m a slacker these days.
Lisa
September 24th, 2008 @ 4:41 pm

Menu planning also saves a lot. And because our evenings are sort of crazy, I have decided to have soup night once a week. One that I can make in the crockpot and have ready for busy kids. (and late working husband)
Justine
September 24th, 2008 @ 4:49 pm

That’s it, ladies. I’m pulling out the wheat in the basement and saving some money. You guys are amazing!
Dalene
September 24th, 2008 @ 7:04 pm

FYI any Wasatch Front readers–it’s caselot sale time at Macey’s.
Rachelle
September 24th, 2008 @ 10:11 pm

Well, I went a little crazy in the canning department this year. My budget this month went through the roof as I bought boxes of tomatoes, peaches and pears. But I am determined that when winter comes around and peaches are $2 or more a pound I will not buy them because I have enough in my refrigerator and on my pantry shelves. I also make lots of jelly, which can get expensive at the store when you are making lots of pb&J. I even make all my pies for the holidays now and freeze them. I always have a handy dessert in the winter. We will see if I can eat my handcooked food storage this year. It is such a challenge to not give into all the grocery store goodies.