Segullah

Mormon women blogging about the peculiar and the treasured

The Saturday-Sunday Phone Phobia

I can’t be the only one who fears phone calls on Saturdays and Sunday mornings. You know the feeling: it’s Saturday evening, a phone number you don’t recognize crosses your caller ID. Is it time to sub for those Sunbeams? Mentally wrestle with a bunch of teenagers? Or, horrors, will you be giving a last [...]

They Should Not Contend

2 Nephi 26:32 And again, the Lord God hath commanded…that they should not contend one with another. My husband and I were raised in two different homes. That’s ridiculous, you say, we were all raised in different homes otherwise that would be kind of creepy. No, but really, on both philosophical and practical levels, our [...]

The Technophile and the Technophobe Go to Church

I downloaded the Gospel Library onto my phone just last week. The kids had taken my scriptures out of the church bag right before we left (probably to make room for more obscene amounts of crayons) and I was left without the standard works. I dislike not having my scriptures with me. I like to [...]

The Holdouts

It started Tuesday, after Cub Scout Pack, at a meeting with the other scout leaders and the Primary President. The president leaned over to me and asked, with a wince on her face, “Hey, could you play the piano again this week in Primary?” In addition to being a Webelos leader, I’m also the backup [...]

I Don’t Have a Friend

Last Sunday I looked around the Relief Society room and realized that after more than a year in my new ward I don’t actually have a friend. This is a somewhat unusual position for me: I always have a friend, and if I don’t, I make one right away. My ward is mostly friendly, but [...]

Say Something

Alright, I admit it. That was me. I was coming out of a light snooze when someone in Sunday School said something political, and I’d had it. Week after week little political barbs had been flying around the room, and in the haze of awakening, when my filter is at its lowest setting, and one [...]

What About Your Walls?

I don’t like Greg Olsen. Well, that’s not true, I’m sure he’s a lovely person, he may even be a gas at dinner parties, but I don’t actually like his art. It’s not my taste. It doesn’t speak to me (in fact, if I’m telling you the most honest thoughts of my heart, sometimes it [...]

Comments I Did Not Make Yesterday in Church

Sister, I don’t care if your baby is a little noisy, no one else does either, sit down and enjoy the lesson. I really don’t think that scripture means what you think it means. Please don’t gloss over that scripture, it’s beautiful and means more than you think it does. Honey, you’re young and not [...]

Exuberant Flaws

In the middle of Sacrament meeting yesterday, my toddler, frustrated from being poached from bed, rushed through cereal, forced to wear clothes, and walk on his own two feet, yelled as loudly as he could, “I WANT TO GO HOME.”

Our Children Can’t Have Coats!

Right around the time when I was starting to get into the rhythm of the speaker’s talk, my 2 year old lost it. His brother, having stolen the black crayon, affected a wide-eyed innocent look that I scarcely had time to enjoy before I whisked the 2 year old out of the chapel. We walked [...]

It’s Rated What?

“I watched an R-rated movie,” I blurted out at the dinner table. My father took in a deep breath that indicated profound disappointment in my actions. We were all quiet for a few minutes. My mom passed the salad. “It was Rain Man,” I couldn’t help the words as they tumbled out of my mouth. [...]

Oh, the Bomb

I only heard my mother swear once. The application had to be postmarked by the end of the day. I didn’t yet have my license, so my mother was going to drive me across the whole town to make it to the post office on time. I don’t remember what happened before, but I do [...]

The Best Work on Butcher Paper Ever

My son was called into school for his Kindergarten assessment test, and like all teachers of small children, his had a project for the mom to do in the other room. She had me trace the outline of my son on a piece of butcher paper and left me with four tempera paint colors to [...]

Sing it Sister–But Not That

When I was growing up Sacrament meeting usually meant a host of things: great talks from brilliant people, gum if we behaved ourselves during the sacrament, trying to convince your parents to let you sit with your best friend’s family, and elaborate musical numbers which ranged from fantastic to awful. The tales of the judge [...]

Goodbye Old Ward!

We’re getting ready to leave the ward that we’ve been in for a decade.  To be honest with you, we never thought we’d stay this long and we never thought it would feel this short.  When I moved in to the ward we’d been married just two years.  Since that time I graduated from college, [...]

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