Book Review of ‘The Mother in Me’

Posted by Michelle L. | September 15, 2008 | 22 Comments

This review comes from Michelle L., our newest blog staffer and Segullah Board member. Welcome Michelle!

A few years ago when I was in the throes of raising five little boys, a well-meaning neighbor dropped a book about depression and various medications in my mailbox.

I didn’t know what to think.

Was I exhausted? Yes.

Overwhelmed? Absolutely.

Depressed? Maybe. But I’d rather talk about it with my husband and doctor than receive a diagnosis in the midst of catalogs and bills.

From my friends and neighbors I simply wanted understanding; I wanted to feel less alone. Today, I found the book that I wish had been placed in my mailbox on that rainy autumn day.

‘The Mother in Me: Real World Reflections of Growing into Motherhood’ is an anthology of prose, poems and photographs by 29 Mormon mothers who capture the beauty, heartache, backbreaking workload and profound joys of motherhood. As I turned each page I marveled at each woman’s honesty and found myself nodding my head, “Yes, yes, I’ve felt exactly that way.”

My stomach churned in an essay about morning sickness, I ached for the mother who felt pressure to have another child before she was ready and I cried for a stillborn baby boy.

The poetry! Admittedly, I’m not one to pick up a book of poems but the beauty in my own life became evident as I read verses describing childbirth, sleepless nights, sibling love and true play.

I love that women in the trenches wrote this book while they were smack in the middle of babies and car seats, diapers and play dates. Too many mothering books are penned in retrospect and lose the fresh, real honesty of life right NOW.

Already, I’ve given away the crib and our strollers are gathering dust as I move onto the next (and I believe easier!) stage of motherhood. Already, I’m forgetting the grueling sleepless nights and endless screaming jags. Already, sadly, I strain to recall the smell of a newborn’s hair and the magic of a toddler’s first steps.

Bless you, Mother in Me for helping me remember.

I’d like a stack of books to give away: one for Heidi who just had her first baby, a copy for Sharon who is mothering three tiny ones, another for my dear friend Kit who spent seven years in infertility clinics begging God for a baby and then felt guilty when she discovered mothering is ridiculously HARD.

Julie is so sick with her 4th pregnancy that she may have to lay on my bed while I read to her. And Amy? Amy came over tonight borrowing a dress. Our conversation quickly dissolved into tears as she cried, “I am ruining my children! What am I doing wrong as a mother? Everyone else is so pulled together. What’s wrong with me?”

We talked and wept and I sent her home with my new book. Tonight she’s too busy bathing, brushing and nursing to read it…but she’ll pick it up one rainy day and know I love her. She’ll know she is not alone.

Soooo, as you know, The Mother in Me was written by our very own Segullah staff. Who’d like to get together for a party, a book-signing, a celebration of real mothers– stretchmarks, messy diaper bags and all?

Category: Book Reviews

Comments

22 Responses to “Book Review of ‘The Mother in Me’”

Justine
September 15th, 2008 @ 10:48 am

Michelle, you just made me cry!
m&m
September 15th, 2008 @ 12:40 pm

Fabulous review. So well stated. This book really can have an impact on so many women’s lives.

And maybe even older women would appreciate it, too — to remember a bit again what it was all like, what it is all like.

(And, for the record, Michelle, you are a fabulous writer.)
Canela
September 15th, 2008 @ 12:53 pm

Thank you for writing a book on well thought out, frank even candid reflections on Motherhood. I have digested enough ¨manuals¨ to know there are no formulas to success. I find the honest exchange of experiences to be more beneficial and helpful as we¨mourn with those who mourn and comfort those who stand in need of comfort¨ and as we rejoice in mothering.
That said, I tried to order a copy and it is out of stock on Amazon. Any other way to obtain one?
m&m
September 15th, 2008 @ 1:02 pm

Canela,
Deseret Book also carries it, so if you live near one, they have them in stock. You can also order deseretbook.com/store/product/5008956 via their web site.
m&m
September 15th, 2008 @ 1:03 pm

Sorry…was on the phone while I was doing that link.

You can order it via DB here.
Emily M.
September 15th, 2008 @ 1:03 pm

Michelle, I’m so glad you enjoyed it.

And Canela, I think it’s not yet in stock on Amazon, but hopefully it will be in soon. In fact, I promise to post something on this thread as soon as Amazon says it’s in stock, just so everyone knows. You can order it directly through Deseret Book, though, here.
Canela
September 15th, 2008 @ 1:06 pm

Thank you, can’t wait to snuggle up and read it.
m&m
September 15th, 2008 @ 1:15 pm

p.s. When you do read it (and especially if you like it), don’t forget to post a review either at Amazon or at DB’s website.
Melissa
September 15th, 2008 @ 2:16 pm

Thanks for the beautiful review, Michelle. And for mentioning your friends and how they may relate to the stories in the book. I love how all of the stories combine to show the power of ordinary lives.
wendy
September 15th, 2008 @ 2:28 pm

I think a book signing sounds wonderful!
Blue
September 15th, 2008 @ 3:33 pm

Big Big Congrats to Michelle & Segullah! Quite a coup for the latter, and it’s about time for the former!

I look forward to reading it M!
♥
Blue
September 15th, 2008 @ 3:34 pm

PS: Can we have the party at your place M? And I’m so sorry about last week. See you in the morning.
♥
brittney c.
September 15th, 2008 @ 5:23 pm

i echo Justine! what a wonderful review. thank you.
Dalene
September 15th, 2008 @ 7:14 pm

Beautiful!
Angela
September 15th, 2008 @ 8:19 pm

I just saw the book in real life for the first time and I wanted to congratulate all of you for creating such a beautiful work of art. It’s really fabulous. And here’s a really cool thing: My mom bought it, and already three different women who don’t normally read poetry have read some of the poems and commented on how beautiful and accessible they are. The whole book is beautiful and accessible and true and needed. I hope all sorts of people hear about it and get the chance to read it.
Luisa
September 15th, 2008 @ 9:53 pm

Yes, yes and yes. party. stretch marks and messy diaper bags.
When and where?
I’m there.
Heather H.
September 17th, 2008 @ 8:19 am

I’m crying too! I can’t wait to get my copy . . . where is it?
Mormon Mommy Wars » And speaking of books….
September 17th, 2008 @ 11:26 am

[...] know who actually did the photos, but they are very pretty. There is a GREAT review of the book here. It’s not a parenting book, really. It’s a book written by mothers, for mothers, and [...]
Jessica
September 18th, 2008 @ 1:55 pm

I am almost done with “the mother in me” and it has been an incredible journey. Thank you from the depths of my soul for the validation, encouragement, laughs, tears, and moments of poignant reflection. Well done ladies, well done. (repost!) I just want to make sure everyone knows how wonderful this book is!
Emily M.
September 18th, 2008 @ 9:25 pm

Jessica, thank you so much. You made my day . Thanks for taking the time to review it on Amazon too,

And Luisa: we’re announcing it officially very soon, but unofficially I can tell you: the University Mall in Orem’s Deseret Book, Saturday, October 18, from 2 to 4 p.m. More info soon!
Kate
September 20th, 2008 @ 8:39 pm

Its temporarily unavailable on Amazon! I hope that means its selling well! I can’t wait for mine to ship.
Kathryn Soper
September 21st, 2008 @ 8:19 am

Amazon just placed a big order from DB, due to high demand. The book should be in stock early this week.