Comments for Segullah

Comment on No good comes from blogging after midnight by Rdo

Rdo — Thu, 17 May 2012 06:12:46 +0000

The proper expression is “got my *dander* up”. Otherwise, good stuff.

Comment on No good comes from blogging after midnight by FoxyJ

FoxyJ — Thu, 17 May 2012 05:06:47 +0000

I’m really uncomfortable with people using the word “Nazi” to describe picky, uptight, or controlling behavior. That was not what the Nazi party was about. I think that, like some commenters have pointed out, we do have to be careful with language because it can be easy to become so broad that meaning is lost. However, I’m not sure the moment of a particular person’s suffering is the time to point out their incorrect language usage.

Comment on No good comes from blogging after midnight by bth

bth — Thu, 17 May 2012 04:37:19 +0000

Okay, first of all, I love that cartoon. And “son of a pirate” is something I really need to start saying. Son of a Pirate! Funny stuff.

Comment on No good comes from blogging after midnight by Alisha

Alisha — Thu, 17 May 2012 04:21:16 +0000

I realized after about seven years of marriage that I was being prideful in how I was treating my mother-in-law. I refused to call her “mom” and hated it when she called me her “daughter.” I really wanted the “-in-law” added to both of those. For a long time, the word “mom” meant strength, independence, and all those qualities that I saw in my mom, but not in my mother-in-law. How wrong I was. Once I figured it out–that the language I used with her could better our relationship–it actually got better. Language is so important in the relationships we have.

Comment on A Letter for My Daughter, Ruby by Jendoop

Jendoop — Thu, 17 May 2012 04:04:38 +0000

This is good, thank you. I missed that talk by Pres. Monson, I never made it through all of the priesthood session, thanks for the link.

Comment on No good comes from blogging after midnight by Jendoop

Jendoop — Thu, 17 May 2012 03:43:08 +0000

I don’t think it’s pride to be so concerned about the words we use. When we don’t hold ourselves to a standard of vocabulary don’t the words take on whole new meanings? If words change meanings where is our common ground for discussion? How can we ever hope to communicate effectively if “rape” means someone opened the public restroom stall on them and to another person it means violently forced sexual contact?

Word meanings are especially important in the church, where our testimonies are intertwined with doctrines taught by lay clergy, where translation into other languages is ongoing, and we often disagree about the usage of simple words like “free” when placed next to “agency”.

Look at recent counsel to be specific in how we proclaim our church membership, not “Mormon” but “I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.” We all know that’s a mouthful and I am hardly ever able to get it all out without tumbling over it and feeling forced to ramble on about what it means and why it’s so long.

And here on the internet words are everything. Unless you have a really great avatar.

Comment on A Letter for My Daughter, Ruby by Emily W.

Emily W. — Thu, 17 May 2012 02:07:30 +0000

Thank you for the goose-bumps!

Comment on No good comes from blogging after midnight by stef

stef — Thu, 17 May 2012 00:36:29 +0000

I think we have all been there to some degree…whether it is written or spoken. I think you hit it on the nose. “I know what hard is…you don’t. So stop complaining.” But I also agree you were right to say we need to take a step back and see that no-one trial is the same because we are all different. SO what may look like a piece of cake to us, may in truth be huge for the other person. Kind of like labor. Some women have no problem popping babies out, while others labor for hours in pain. We should not judge…me included…we should not.

Comment on No good comes from blogging after midnight by M Miles

M Miles — Wed, 16 May 2012 23:55:44 +0000

I don’t think it’s pride, at least not necessarily. I don’t like it when people use the word rape to describe x,y or the trauma of z. If it’s not rape, don’t say you felt like you were raped.

I also don’t like it when people use terms like PTSD to describe anything but real-life PTSD.

Our suffering isn’t equal. We can’t start calling everything the same thing and/or describing things in the same way because we want people to understand, “MY LIFE IS REALLY HARD.” People may feel justified, or are trying to say life sucks. Sure, say things are crappy, or a bad experience was crappy–but don’t pretend the worst things imaginable=the suffering you happen to experience.

I’m not sure why people do this. But I think there is a risk to not being able to recognize real suffering and real atrocities if we decide it’s all subjective, because it’s not. Frex, it downplays the holocaust to label things a holocaust that aren’t, in fact, the holocaust. We need to be able to recognize real suffering on scale.

That being said, it’s not really fair to downplay someone’s suffering to the degree that you don’t think they are suffering. Frex, just because you had a baby and handled it just peachy doesn’t mean you should think the sister who is really struggling with baby number one should just quit whining and buck up.

Comment on No good comes from blogging after midnight by Cheryl

Cheryl — Wed, 16 May 2012 23:43:52 +0000

Morgan, I need to remember that last phrase!

Heather, I understand this too well. In fact, I almost destroyed a 28 year friendship over the language my friend used in order to show me sympathy during one of the hardest times of my life. I was livid. How dare she claim to understand the specifics?? Luckily, we rebuilt that bridge after I gorged myself on humble pie. And cake. And brownies.

We should never compare trials. We should be careful what we write and speak– absolutely. But we should forgive quicker, and I still wish I hadn’t learned that the hard way.