Comments on: Dark Glass, Energy of Heart

By: Kay

Kay — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 11:06:25 +0000

Growing up is hard, but to be honest I find it hard to be a grown up too. As an adult we are expected to handle things better. My husband requested me to be more tolerant of his timekeeping last week, and often asks me to calm down. I know I need to work harder at my dealings with people. We rarely know the full situation or people’s backgrounds, the behaviour that we see is jsut a small part of their life. I would love people to have more empathy for me when things go wrong, or even I act/speak and unknowingly hurt someone. This requires me to be working on it too. To see others as Christ sees them, to try to see the bigger picture. Recently I decided to fast every Sunday to try to improve some of my relationships, it is a little thing but one I hope will reap rewards in the long run.

By: Selwyn

Selwyn — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 07:26:40 +0000

Having survived a similar high school life to yours, Emily, I know the possible situation for my kids. Which in someways is heartbreaking, but I try to remember that I have been through it so chances are I will be able to recognise, empathise and identify with what they (may) go through.

I hope and pray that my (awful) memories will help me be more compassionate and understanding – charitable – to my sons as they navigate school, and be to them the support I wish I had had. If only I could have the clear seeing charity as permanent lenses…

By: Emily M.

Emily M. — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 03:35:05 +0000

Thanks for the comments/sympathy, all. Michelle, I love the idea of the Spirit as a Samuel the Lamanite-style buffer. It is so true! When I have that kind of Spirit, I am not bugged by anything. Mara, that’s totally true–in junior high, I wasn’t self-aware at all, and I do think there’s a correspondence between awareness of self (in a non-narcissistic way) and awareness of others.

Ah, Dovie, you are right–charity is not just the seeing, it’s also the doing and the feeling. But for me, seeing is the first step.

ErinAnn, I’m not really in that place either. I wish I were. Writing this has helped me with it.

Kathryn, I pray to see my kids as they really are, whenever i remember, because so often I am blinded by the socks left all over the floor, if you know what I mean.

Thanks, everyone.

By: Melissa M.

Melissa M. — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 02:32:02 +0000

Emily, I loved the writing in this post. My heart aches for the junior high you. I wish I knew why children/teenagers can be so cruel, but I love your suggestion to see others with clear-sightedness—even the mean girls and the bullies. Thanks for sharing this beautiful piece with us.

By: Karen M.

Karen M. — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 23:54:33 +0000

Very well put. I think if we can really clearly see anyone, we can’t help but love them.

By: Kathryn P.

Kathryn P. — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 22:52:51 +0000

Dear young mothers,
There is no truth to the rumor that Emily and I have accepted kickbacks from homeschooling special interest groups. It is just a coincidence that I wrote about scary teachers and she wrote about scary students within a 48 hour time span.

Actually, Emily, your post made me want to weep because I could connect with it on so many levels. I could remember childhood cruelty and I could remember having those same fears for my children. I loved the little vignette about your daughter.

There are two times when I often find myself praying that I will be able to see someone as God sees them. I pray for that occasionally during testimony meeting in my ward. I also pray for that with my adult children because I get impatient with their spiritual progression and want them to see things like I see them at the age of fifty. The irony of my impatience is that they are light years ahead of where I was at their age. The most cool thing about praying to see your children as God sees them is that the answer may involve seeing who they were in their first estate. That knowledge has brought me great peace…

By: ErinAnn

ErinAnn — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 22:01:25 +0000

I still kind of wish I had punched one of those mean girls in the face. I would look back fondly on that. haha. I suppose I’m not where “you’re at”.

Hopefully, though, when my daughters encounter those unhappy little jerks my husband and I will have continued to build a close and supportive relationship with our children. Parents who don’t champion their children (out of choice or ignorance) can be the difference between achievement and happiness or misery and failure.

My younger sister and I both had a rough time in elem/jrHigh. My parents sometime mention that they should have done more at that time.

They’re right. They should have. I don’t want to feel that way in 20 years.

By: Karyn

Karyn — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 20:11:14 +0000

One of my best friends always says that there are two types of people in the world, people she loves and people she doesn’t understand. I think clear-sightedness moves individuals from the second category to the first. And sometimes, when after all we can do, a person is still un-understandable (is that a word?), it’s comforting to know that the Lord understands him or her.

By: m&m

m&m — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 20:11:01 +0000

I can relate to so much of this.

And I love your reflections on truth. Thank you.

Beautifully done.

By: Annie

Annie — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 20:05:31 +0000

I love this. Thinking of the “pure love of Christ” as having the pure vision of Christ. Because what better way to show love and be loved than to really see and be seen?

Beautiful writing, Emily. Thank you for sharing it.