Comments on: Inconvenient Christianity

By: Carrie

Carrie — Mon, 20 Aug 2007 02:28:41 +0000

I have only one thing to add to this discussion and that is the thought and belief that there are seasons of life when we are able to give more and other seasons when we aren’t able to give as much. Accepting that has helped me strike a much needed balance in my life. Give what you can and make your peace with the Lord. He will gently nudge when you need to do more and let you know that He accepts when you have given all you can.

By: Tiffany

Tiffany — Sat, 18 Aug 2007 07:24:18 +0000

Back to Whiner’s and Darlene’s comments, I agree we are a Relief Society, but if you look at the Proclamation on the Family, it states very clearly that we are to go to Extended Family first. I have no problem asking for help from the Relief Society if that possibility has been exhausted. And Darlene, your point that the Relief Society can and should organize help is a good one.
My cousin was diagnosed with breast cancer when she was 27. She was the mother of two young children and was pregnant with her third. She and her husband lived far away from extended family and frankly her extended family really had no possibility to offer much help. A friend of their family told us that during the year that the ward gave service above and beyond they became a ward family. It became a tremendous blessing to the entire ward. I am grateful that my cousin had loving people who helped her in her most difficult time and that her children and husband received love and support. I am sure that the service required was difficult and burdensome and very inconvenient. But they gave it and made my cousin’s last days comforting.

By: Geo

Geo — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 22:17:43 +0000

Thanks for this insightful post and all the thoughtful comments.

By: martha

martha — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 21:38:13 +0000

I believe the meals that we bring each other ‘feed’ us in more ways then one.
I loved Dalene’s comment that “sometimes it is the only thing we can do”. I’m not always sure what to verbally say, but sharing my food is an extension of what is in my heart.

By: Michelle

Michelle — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 21:33:42 +0000

In regards to a comment about taking in meals. I believe a hot meal is not about the food. It is merely a symbol of love and comfort. Sometimes it is the only thing we can do, and so we just do it.

Thanks for saying what I was thinking. Such an important lesson to learn. I feel the same way about funeral meals. It’s as much for the love and support we show than about the food.

By: Dalene

Dalene — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 21:20:02 +0000

In response to whiner and to whoever else has had to deal with extreme requests, I just want to point out we are called a Relief Society. We need to work together to distribute the load when people have extreme needs–and sometimes they do. It’s a model of church service that is centuries–even millenia old. I like Justine’s idea of offering what you can do, but then I think the RS has some responsibility to organize help from other sisters as well.

In regards to a comment about taking in meals. I believe a hot meal is not about the food. It is merely a symbol of love and comfort. Sometimes it is the only thing we can do, and so we just do it. I am thankful to have learned this lesson early on. When my father died I was only 19. My mother was younger than I am now and still had five other children still at home. Friends and neighbors of any religion brought in food for an entire week. It was a good thing because the last thing you think about at a time like that is what to fix for. On most days you can barely bring yourself to eat, but you need to take in sustenance. Because of that service rendered and other manifestions of love and support my family received I still look back at that time and can feel the love served up in Corning and Tupperware.

By: Tiffany

Tiffany — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 18:55:29 +0000

Xena, I don’t think your post come off as angry and bitter at all.

I think you were helping the woman you were visiting teaching. And you realized when what you could give wasn’t enough.

I think that is an important part of service, when we can see when the problem is bigger than what we can help with.

By: Xena

Xena — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 18:12:42 +0000

I don’t know how it happens, but every time I post somewhere, it comes off sounding angry and bitter…I’m really not angry and bitter…

My experience above was hard — I thought at the time that I was being this great visiting teacher and doing the things that the bishop and the RS president asked of me in her service. Everyone was telling me what a great service I was doing for this woman and her family, and it was kind of an ego trip. It wasn’t until the middle of the night phone call from jail that I realized that I was in WAY over my head. Substance abuse recovery is not something that can be handled with love, visits, and scripture study. It was just too much for me alone, and unfortunately, we lived in a ward where everyone was needy, so there wasn’t much backup either. I finally had to ask to be reassigned because I just couldn’t handle it all anymore.

I completely agree with so many of you who have said that we need to find a balance. And I whole heartedly agree with Kathryn’s statement:

“Just because itâ€™s hard, doesnâ€™t mean we shouldnâ€™t do it. But at the same time, as a very wise friend once told me, just because itâ€™s hard doesnâ€™t mean we should do it. We are to be wise stewards over ourselves and our families.”

I think the Lord looks at our hearts and our desire to serve even if our circumstances may keep us from doing everything we could.

By: Andrea

Andrea — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 18:07:10 +0000

I hear you. I have a hard time saying “No”, but I often go about doing requested things with a “Laman” attitude. Like when a new “friend” asked me to watch her kids (who I grew to dispise over the course of watching them for five days). I know it’s all about the attitude, and finding joy in serving, but that doesn’t happen sometimes.

In one ward my partner asked if we could come over and help clean our VTees house. My partner was much more “Christian” than I was/am. I wouldn’t hesitate to be disgusted at the dirty home, but it didn’t cross my mind to help. I’m glad that I’ve had good examples around me.

By: Waiting at the WIC office. « Dis Organized

Waiting at the WIC office. « Dis Organized — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 17:04:59 +0000

I may be missing out on life again. Check out this slice-of-life Guest Post by Emily Anne, with interesting discussion of Inconvenient Christianity. Over at Segullah. One thing I can say in favor of inconvenienceâ€“I know Iâ€™m alive while itâ€™s happening. And I havenâ€™t been party to it lately.