Comments on: To my Mothers. . . http://segullah.org/daily-special/mothers-day/to-my-mothers/ Mormon women blogging about the peculiar and the treasured Wed, 23 May 2012 16:56:53 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.2 By: Dalene http://segullah.org/daily-special/mothers-day/to-my-mothers/#comment-8821 Dalene Tue, 08 May 2007 14:13:32 +0000 http://segullah.org/blog/uncategorized/to-my-mothers/#comment-8821 I have had a different experience entirely. I will never forget my dear grandmother, who is now 90, coming over to my house on one crazy day. (What am I thinking? They were all crazy days). I apologized for the perpetual mess. She said, "That's OK, I remember what it was like." She did not. Her house was always immaculate and still is. I probably sat there on the sofa amidst the mess and held my baby--I can't even remember which one. Then she told me how much she regretted growing up in a day when doctors told mothers not to pick up their babies when they cried. And that holding an infant too much would spoil him or her. And a day when mothers did what their doctors told them to do without questioning their white-coated wisdom. I'm at a bit of an odd place in the road. I look back on the path behind me and I clearly remember thinking I would never see the end of changing diapers, cleaning up spilt milk, not really waking from too many sleepless nights. Now I look not too far forward on the path ahead and have panic attacks because I realize that in just over a year my oldest son will be gone from me for two whole years. No hugs. No bye, I love you Moms. Just an empty chair. I almost can't breathe. I know it can be annoying to hear those words "Enjoy it while you can" when you are deep in the middle. But I also know that it's probably said with regret for days long since passed. I'm with jennifer b. I hope I just just hold open a door, offer a hand or a hug and not say a word. Just smile and love. I have had a different experience entirely. I will never forget my dear grandmother, who is now 90, coming over to my house on one crazy day. (What am I thinking? They were all crazy days). I apologized for the perpetual mess. She said, “That’s OK, I remember what it was like.” She did not. Her house was always immaculate and still is. I probably sat there on the sofa amidst the mess and held my baby–I can’t even remember which one. Then she told me how much she regretted growing up in a day when doctors told mothers not to pick up their babies when they cried. And that holding an infant too much would spoil him or her. And a day when mothers did what their doctors told them to do without questioning their white-coated wisdom.

I’m at a bit of an odd place in the road. I look back on the path behind me and I clearly remember thinking I would never see the end of changing diapers, cleaning up spilt milk, not really waking from too many sleepless nights. Now I look not too far forward on the path ahead and have panic attacks because I realize that in just over a year my oldest son will be gone from me for two whole years. No hugs. No bye, I love you Moms. Just an empty chair. I almost can’t breathe.

I know it can be annoying to hear those words “Enjoy it while you can” when you are deep in the middle. But I also know that it’s probably said with regret for days long since passed.

I’m with jennifer b. I hope I just just hold open a door, offer a hand or a hug and not say a word. Just smile and love.

]]> By: brooke http://segullah.org/daily-special/mothers-day/to-my-mothers/#comment-8806 brooke Tue, 08 May 2007 05:03:57 +0000 http://segullah.org/blog/uncategorized/to-my-mothers/#comment-8806 it's nice to know that all mothers get these comments; sometimes i think it must be the look on my face as i walk the halls of church (yet again) during sacrament meeting that makes every older passerby say something like, "oh, it goes so fast," etc. i'm TRYING to appreciate this time, while they're little and still think i'm cool and want to hang out with me-- and further, i DO fear what the future may hold as my children's boo-boo's exceed what can be kissed and made better by a band-aid. it’s nice to know that all mothers get these comments; sometimes i think it must be the look on my face as i walk the halls of church (yet again) during sacrament meeting that makes every older passerby say something like, “oh, it goes so fast,” etc.

i’m TRYING to appreciate this time, while they’re little and still think i’m cool and want to hang out with me– and further, i DO fear what the future may hold as my children’s boo-boo’s exceed what can be kissed and made better by a band-aid.

]]> By: Jennifer B. http://segullah.org/daily-special/mothers-day/to-my-mothers/#comment-8766 Jennifer B. Mon, 07 May 2007 06:25:50 +0000 http://segullah.org/blog/uncategorized/to-my-mothers/#comment-8766 Justine, I loved this! I have heard plenty of insensitive comments that seem to imply whatever stage of life I'm in is easy. I so want to be the kind of woman who can appreciate and encourage others without seeming out-of-touch or condescending. Nice post. Justine, I loved this! I have heard plenty of insensitive comments that seem to imply whatever stage of life I’m in is easy. I so want to be the kind of woman who can appreciate and encourage others without seeming out-of-touch or condescending. Nice post.

]]> By: Sharlee http://segullah.org/daily-special/mothers-day/to-my-mothers/#comment-8665 Sharlee Sat, 05 May 2007 02:40:56 +0000 http://segullah.org/blog/uncategorized/to-my-mothers/#comment-8665 Ha! Oops. Sorry about that, Texasgal. Yes, there *is* something quite apocalyptic about having teenagers. Ha! Oops. Sorry about that, Texasgal. Yes, there *is* something quite apocalyptic about having teenagers.

]]> By: Courtney http://segullah.org/daily-special/mothers-day/to-my-mothers/#comment-8661 Courtney Sat, 05 May 2007 00:11:07 +0000 http://segullah.org/blog/uncategorized/to-my-mothers/#comment-8661 I like Sharlee's use of "tricker" verses "harder." I am going to use that more often. Justine you are a brilliant mother, and Happy Mother's Day to you! I like Sharlee’s use of “tricker” verses “harder.” I am going to use that more often.

Justine you are a brilliant mother, and Happy Mother’s Day to you!

]]> By: texasgal http://segullah.org/daily-special/mothers-day/to-my-mothers/#comment-8656 texasgal Fri, 04 May 2007 21:56:48 +0000 http://segullah.org/blog/uncategorized/to-my-mothers/#comment-8656 Oh I fear that I wasn't clear. I am referring to the "last days" events that are ahead. Although having teenagers may be a cataclysm in itself, hee hee. I think many of us will be involved in actual end-of-days calamities. I am not really scared, I feel prepared and I know we'll figure out a way, but I think any who once thought our generation has it easy will soon find that laughable. We'll probably get extremely hard tests and have to show what we're made of. So yes, I'm enjoying my "easy" life until then. Oh I fear that I wasn’t clear. I am referring to the “last days” events that are ahead. Although having teenagers may be a cataclysm in itself, hee hee. I think many of us will be involved in actual end-of-days calamities.

I am not really scared, I feel prepared and I know we’ll figure out a way, but I think any who once thought our generation has it easy will soon find that laughable. We’ll probably get extremely hard tests and have to show what we’re made of. So yes, I’m enjoying my “easy” life until then.

]]> By: Justine http://segullah.org/daily-special/mothers-day/to-my-mothers/#comment-8652 Justine Fri, 04 May 2007 20:53:38 +0000 http://segullah.org/blog/uncategorized/to-my-mothers/#comment-8652 Sharlee, that's just one of the many reasons I love you so much! I have had so many women say that exact thing to me, and it just feels so exclusionary and hurtful. I love how you are able to succinctly say that all our seasons of life profer different challenges. They're ALL hard! But I wouldn't ever dare tell my sweet arthritic, 90 year old widow neighbor whom I love dearly that she's just got to suck it up and be tough. All the challenges are tough. All of them present opportunities to grow, and all of them offer all our mother's opportunities to support. And every once in a while, I get to mother someone, too. It feels so good to be a part of a continium of support and love. Sharlee, that’s just one of the many reasons I love you so much! I have had so many women say that exact thing to me, and it just feels so exclusionary and hurtful. I love how you are able to succinctly say that all our seasons of life profer different challenges. They’re ALL hard!

But I wouldn’t ever dare tell my sweet arthritic, 90 year old widow neighbor whom I love dearly that she’s just got to suck it up and be tough. All the challenges are tough. All of them present opportunities to grow, and all of them offer all our mother’s opportunities to support.

And every once in a while, I get to mother someone, too. It feels so good to be a part of a continium of support and love.

]]> By: Sharlee http://segullah.org/daily-special/mothers-day/to-my-mothers/#comment-8651 Sharlee Fri, 04 May 2007 20:32:10 +0000 http://segullah.org/blog/uncategorized/to-my-mothers/#comment-8651 Texasgal, you're right! But, as one who is in that "next stage" (teenagers), I would never tell a mother of young children: "Watch out! It gets worse!" That would just be cruel.:-) The truth is, NOTHING is harder than those exhausting, sleep-deprived, no-time-to-yourself, constantly-on-call years of pregnancy, nursing, babies and toddlers. True, there are new and often more serious challenges to face as your kids get older, and the stakes get higher, but I wouldn't say that it gets "harder." It DOES get trickier though. *sigh* Texasgal, you’re right! But, as one who is in that “next stage” (teenagers), I would never tell a mother of young children: “Watch out! It gets worse!” That would just be cruel.:-) The truth is, NOTHING is harder than those exhausting, sleep-deprived, no-time-to-yourself, constantly-on-call years of pregnancy, nursing, babies and toddlers. True, there are new and often more serious challenges to face as your kids get older, and the stakes get higher, but I wouldn’t say that it gets “harder.”

It DOES get trickier though. *sigh*

]]> By: texasgal http://segullah.org/daily-special/mothers-day/to-my-mothers/#comment-8649 texasgal Fri, 04 May 2007 19:43:33 +0000 http://segullah.org/blog/uncategorized/to-my-mothers/#comment-8649 Yeah and guess what else? We aren't even done yet. The worst of what we'll go through is likely still ahead. If we have it "easy" at the moment, let's be glad, because we know things are going to get worse before they get better. When all is said and done, I doubt anyone will say this generation got off easy! Yeah and guess what else? We aren’t even done yet. The worst of what we’ll go through is likely still ahead. If we have it “easy” at the moment, let’s be glad, because we know things are going to get worse before they get better. When all is said and done, I doubt anyone will say this generation got off easy!

]]> By: Emily M. http://segullah.org/daily-special/mothers-day/to-my-mothers/#comment-8641 Emily M. Fri, 04 May 2007 15:21:44 +0000 http://segullah.org/blog/uncategorized/to-my-mothers/#comment-8641 ooh, ooh! I have such a great response to this...I am saving it for next week, though. I am also grateful for all the mothers who encourage me without judging. Great post, Justine. ooh, ooh! I have such a great response to this…I am saving it for next week, though.

I am also grateful for all the mothers who encourage me without judging. Great post, Justine.

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