There’s been so much said, I don’t even know what to add. But I will say that knowing my mom had some lingerie she packed up for vacations with my dad didn’t hurt my attitude toward sex at all. And for our second anniversary my husband and I went to Barnes and Noble to peruse the section of sex books and were very pleased to find one written specifically for people in committed relationships that just gave us some good advice and ideas. We had the other books written by church members that talked about the doctrine of it, but we needed some help with the mechanics and hey, it helps. A good fitting leopard print bra can help sometimes too.

Michelle, you made my day with that quip!

“There are times for making love and there are times for just “gettin’ busy”
‘

I hear that.

Hellmut – Having lived in Germany for almost 5 years, I did not see one incident of a man bullying a woman. However, I witnessed many on the U.S. Air Force Base. I don’t know what to say – it is sad we don’t teach more respect for one another. As far as Mormon men goes, let’s hope that isn’t the case for the majority. But, having had three attempted dry humps on me when I was in my early twenties, I believe disrespectful actions happen more often than we realize. Just goes to show we need to talk to our girls. Some might not even know what the boy is doing.

And, I did go into a “Blue Boutique” type store in Germany and WOW those Germans know how to get things going. Glad I married one…hee, hee.

Angie – Nothing is wrong with buying things on the same day. I didn’t say that. I just wondered if women were doing it. Want to go shopping?

Darlene – Well, what happened next? Did someone explain it to her?

I’m with Kathryn on being happy the church has no stance on what goes on in the bedroom between husband and wife. I think I’d be really upset if they did.

Thanks again for your insightful comments.

Sorry…I must not be making my point clearly enough. I’m not necessarily saying the whole world thinks of sex in a bad way. But I am pretty sure that very few in the world really think of sex as a sacred element of a God-sanctioned relationship. Sex can be not-bad but still not have the significance that it does in the plan of salvation. That is my view of why Sister Nelson said what she said, but I could have been reading her wrong. I think it’s less about ‘they are doing it WRONG and you can do it RIGHT by calling it something else’ but more about just trying to encourage a paradigm shift, different from what even many members of the Church may not appreciate. It’s too easy to have a pretty temporal view of this topic, which isn’t necessarily BAD at all but it may not be the BEST. I doubt she thinks that simply changing names would change the whole picture, but as part of a new way of approaching this aspect of life, I can understand what she was getting at.

Does that make more sense?

I do understand the whole ‘how can she write a book without having been married’ but I do think someone can teach true principles even without having experienced them all. I knew motherhood and marriage were divine before I experienced them. Sheri Dew gave some of the best talks on these topics without having experienced them. The Spirit can work that way. I imagine that in her years and years of counseling, she was able to discern truth and what worked. I trust that, even if perhaps the reality of implementing ideals. All I know is that what I read (I haven’t read it all) really felt good and right, for me. What I have found, though, is that sometimes a book will come along that is what I needed at that time, but won’t necessarily have the same impact for someone else. Dif’rent strokes and all that.

Ah, I wax longwinded….