Comments on: Can I Sit On Your Lap? http://segullah.org/segullah-article-discussions/can-i-sit-on-your-lap/ Mormon women blogging about the peculiar and the treasured Thu, 24 May 2012 08:40:27 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.2 By: Katie Lila http://segullah.org/segullah-article-discussions/can-i-sit-on-your-lap/#comment-101701 Katie Lila Wed, 10 Sep 2008 06:03:02 +0000 http://segullah.org/?p=964#comment-101701 Why am I laughing through blubbery tears and trying to compose myself enough to write? Because we are all here in the thick of it, aren't we? Each voice of a mother, some i know well and some i do not, strummed a chord so close to my core that I physically felt the vibration. These feelings are the essence of what we are... how interesting that when one dares to put them in print we all breath a heavy sigh of relief and think, "Oh, you too". Thanks for taking 3 days off, dragging your kids out in the rain, leaving the dishes, offering your lap, making plaster footprints, going to a midnight fun-run with your kids-(Lori),and soaking in the smell of your babie's velvet hair. I wish I could make a blue ribbon for each of you that stated in shiny, gold letters your success..."I didn't do the dishes, I played instead!" That makes me laugh aloud just thinking of the looks you'd get at the supermarket. Maybe other women would ask you where you got it and if you'd be willing to sell it. But, of course you wouldn't because it is going in your memory book as a reminder of the day you snagged a moment from the clutches of motherhood chaos and just lived in it. Why am I laughing through blubbery tears and trying to compose myself enough to write? Because we are all here in the thick of it, aren’t we? Each voice of a mother, some i know well and some i do not, strummed a chord so close to my core that I physically felt the vibration. These feelings are the essence of what we are… how interesting that when one dares to put them in print we all breath a heavy sigh of relief and think, “Oh, you too”. Thanks for taking 3 days off, dragging your kids out in the rain, leaving the dishes, offering your lap, making plaster footprints, going to a midnight fun-run with your kids-(Lori),and soaking in the smell of your babie’s velvet hair. I wish I could make a blue ribbon for each of you that stated in shiny, gold letters your success…”I didn’t do the dishes, I played instead!” That makes me laugh aloud just thinking of the looks you’d get at the supermarket. Maybe other women would ask you where you got it and if you’d be willing to sell it. But, of course you wouldn’t because it is going in your memory book as a reminder of the day you snagged a moment from the clutches of motherhood chaos and just lived in it.

]]> By: Carly http://segullah.org/segullah-article-discussions/can-i-sit-on-your-lap/#comment-101489 Carly Tue, 09 Sep 2008 06:10:07 +0000 http://segullah.org/?p=964#comment-101489 Heather I loved this post. I have moments of panic where I think "I am doing something wrong, this isn't the kind of childhood I imagined my kids having." These moments usually come when everyone is crying, or chanting "your a mean mommy" (yes they actually chant this). It is good to be reminded that not every moment will be perfect but to notice the good moments and try to focus on them. Today it rained (ahh a miracle in vegas) and I stopped making dinner and dragged the kids out barefoot to play on the dirty asphalt. They were soaked and laughing and I tried to close my eyes and remember this moment for the next time things go south! your wonderful! Heather I loved this post. I have moments of panic where I think “I am doing something wrong, this isn’t the kind of childhood I imagined my kids having.” These moments usually come when everyone is crying, or chanting “your a mean mommy” (yes they actually chant this). It is good to be reminded that not every moment will be perfect but to notice the good moments and try to focus on them. Today it rained (ahh a miracle in vegas) and I stopped making dinner and dragged the kids out barefoot to play on the dirty asphalt. They were soaked and laughing and I tried to close my eyes and remember this moment for the next time things go south! your wonderful!

]]> By: heather simkins jones http://segullah.org/segullah-article-discussions/can-i-sit-on-your-lap/#comment-100820 heather simkins jones Fri, 05 Sep 2008 18:02:21 +0000 http://segullah.org/?p=964#comment-100820 heather i miss you and nyc!! this has been a very rattling week for me as a parent and this post (and subsequent comments) were so comforting to read. i'm so far from all my english speaking friends but the blog-o-sphere has really helped me sort out my parenting crises regardless of distance. i am caught up, like the rest of you, in this chaos of choice. me or them. really, that’s where the fissure is. all they want is me 100% and lately all i seem to want is me too -- to myself. my crises is that it’s not working and i know i need to choose to operate more deliberately and less on auto-parent. all these other things (books, writing, research)are in a state of stasis they will linger&hover&last but my little 4 and 2yearold will not always approach me like they do now. i think we all acutely know this and so it makes the struggle much, much more agonizing. it’s not always easy to do what you know is best. thanks for your voices. heather
i miss you and nyc!! this has been a very rattling week for me as a parent and this post (and subsequent comments) were so comforting to read. i’m so far from all my english speaking friends but the blog-o-sphere has really helped me sort out my parenting crises regardless of distance.

i am caught up, like the rest of you, in this chaos of choice. me or them. really, that’s where the fissure is. all they want is me 100% and lately all i seem to want is me too — to myself. my crises is that it’s not working and i know i need to choose to operate more deliberately and less on auto-parent. all these other things (books, writing, research)are in a state of stasis they will linger&hover&last but my little 4 and 2yearold will not always approach me like they do now. i think we all acutely know this and so it makes the struggle much, much more agonizing. it’s not always easy to do what you know is best.

thanks for your voices.

]]> By: Lori Joffs http://segullah.org/segullah-article-discussions/can-i-sit-on-your-lap/#comment-100082 Lori Joffs Wed, 03 Sep 2008 19:37:23 +0000 http://segullah.org/?p=964#comment-100082 Heath- I love you for that blog! I am so trying to live in the moment. Please let's remind each other often how blessed we are. I am blessed to have a sister who can write things like I want to write things. Thank you for this special entry. I agree with everything you said and couldn't have said it better myself. Heath- I love you for that blog! I am so trying to live in the moment. Please let’s remind each other often how blessed we are. I am blessed to have a sister who can write things like I want to write things. Thank you for this special entry. I agree with everything you said and couldn’t have said it better myself.

]]> By: Heather H. http://segullah.org/segullah-article-discussions/can-i-sit-on-your-lap/#comment-99645 Heather H. Tue, 02 Sep 2008 14:35:13 +0000 http://segullah.org/?p=964#comment-99645 It's all about balance, isn't it? Finding joy in the doing of the daily stuff as well and making time to play and dance and camp and just be together. I just came home from taking my daughter to her first day of kindergarten and I had to walk out into the hall and cry. I am not scared for her or worried, I'm just sad . . .I think I'm going to miss her and it's only the beginning. Anyway . . .I do appreciate the comments. It's just good to take a minute and reflect and think and feel gratitude instead of stress. It’s all about balance, isn’t it? Finding joy in the doing of the daily stuff as well and making time to play and dance and camp and just be together. I just came home from taking my daughter to her first day of kindergarten and I had to walk out into the hall and cry. I am not scared for her or worried, I’m just sad . . .I think I’m going to miss her and it’s only the beginning. Anyway . . .I do appreciate the comments. It’s just good to take a minute and reflect and think and feel gratitude instead of stress.

]]> By: Dalene http://segullah.org/segullah-article-discussions/can-i-sit-on-your-lap/#comment-99629 Dalene Tue, 02 Sep 2008 13:41:12 +0000 http://segullah.org/?p=964#comment-99629 Great post Heather. I love all the perspectives shared in the comments as well. This is timely for me as my oldest just left the nest for a mission and I've been trying not to have any regrets. I've tried to be aware of how precious time is the whole way through, but I think it's especially hard with the oldest because you're so excited about each new stage you're looking forward to. Then you get another kid (and more) and you're so busy. I tried to enjoy the simple things and let things go that were less important, but it still all passed so quickly. One of the best things I did though was right before Luke left I took three days off and I told him they were his. We got stuff done, but we also played and did whatever he wanted to do. I don't have any regrets about those three days. Great post Heather. I love all the perspectives shared in the comments as well. This is timely for me as my oldest just left the nest for a mission and I’ve been trying not to have any regrets. I’ve tried to be aware of how precious time is the whole way through, but I think it’s especially hard with the oldest because you’re so excited about each new stage you’re looking forward to. Then you get another kid (and more) and you’re so busy. I tried to enjoy the simple things and let things go that were less important, but it still all passed so quickly.

One of the best things I did though was right before Luke left I took three days off and I told him they were his. We got stuff done, but we also played and did whatever he wanted to do. I don’t have any regrets about those three days.

]]> By: jendoop http://segullah.org/segullah-article-discussions/can-i-sit-on-your-lap/#comment-99618 jendoop Tue, 02 Sep 2008 13:05:23 +0000 http://segullah.org/?p=964#comment-99618 This summer I have followed Elder Ballard's counsel to enjoy the good moments with my kids. We've had a great summer (I like Smee have to give thanks to the financial support in all of it, my DH). Now that they go back to school I'm scared of what the year will bring. These days are golden moments, when they want to be home with me tye dying or camping out in the backyard. Dances, dating and jobs are not too far away and I don't want to let any day slip through my fingers. This summer I have followed Elder Ballard’s counsel to enjoy the good moments with my kids. We’ve had a great summer (I like Smee have to give thanks to the financial support in all of it, my DH). Now that they go back to school I’m scared of what the year will bring. These days are golden moments, when they want to be home with me tye dying or camping out in the backyard. Dances, dating and jobs are not too far away and I don’t want to let any day slip through my fingers.

]]> By: tonya http://segullah.org/segullah-article-discussions/can-i-sit-on-your-lap/#comment-99553 tonya Tue, 02 Sep 2008 08:01:26 +0000 http://segullah.org/?p=964#comment-99553 Still up doing laundry...I've just been thinking that when my girls were little I had to MAKE time for them. Amidst all the mom things I was responsible for. Now that they are teens I find I have to TAKE time. Little snippets of time, in the car, at the kitchen table, when they're getting makeup on....etc. Interesting how it all changes.... Still up doing laundry…I’ve just been thinking that when my girls were little I had to MAKE time for them. Amidst all the mom things I was responsible for. Now that they are teens I find I have to TAKE time. Little snippets of time, in the car, at the kitchen table, when they’re getting makeup on….etc. Interesting how it all changes….

]]> By: mormonhermitmom http://segullah.org/segullah-article-discussions/can-i-sit-on-your-lap/#comment-99542 mormonhermitmom Tue, 02 Sep 2008 07:25:34 +0000 http://segullah.org/?p=964#comment-99542 Why is it so hard to slow down? It seems like when school is done for the day, homework has to be done, dinner put on the table, chores to supervise, church activities to go to and the moments just aren't there. And then at night, I'm too exhausted to do anything but sleep. Where do you carve out those moments? Why is it so hard to slow down? It seems like when school is done for the day, homework has to be done, dinner put on the table, chores to supervise, church activities to go to and the moments just aren’t there. And then at night, I’m too exhausted to do anything but sleep. Where do you carve out those moments?

]]> By: Kathy http://segullah.org/segullah-article-discussions/can-i-sit-on-your-lap/#comment-99518 Kathy Tue, 02 Sep 2008 04:25:27 +0000 http://segullah.org/?p=964#comment-99518 I have had so many days like this. It is so great when the spirit helps us put things in perspective. Your comments really struck home. I haven't heard that quote before but it has such meaning. As a mom of 5 kids, 4 of them boys, I have MANY crazy days. At the end of the day, when they are all asleep, I wish I had held them more, hugged them tighter and listened more intently. Thank you for your insight. By the way, I don't even know how I came across your blog, but I am going to have to add it to my list... I love it! I have had so many days like this. It is so great when the spirit helps us put things in perspective. Your comments really struck home. I haven’t heard that quote before but it has such meaning. As a mom of 5 kids, 4 of them boys, I have MANY crazy days. At the end of the day, when they are all asleep, I wish I had held them more, hugged them tighter and listened more intently. Thank you for your insight.

By the way, I don’t even know how I came across your blog, but I am going to have to add it to my list… I love it!

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