A new crown, no prospects of royalty and today’s a new day

Posted by Jenny Whitcomb | November 25, 2009 | 10 Comments

toothbrush

Yesterday I sat in the dentist chair with the drill humming in the background and I made a resolve NEVER to eat sugar again. I promised myself that I’ll floss everyday. I swear I’ll be more vigilant with my kids’ teeth so that they don’t have to endure agony in the chair. I carried home extra toothbrushes and packs of mini floss to put on the dinner table, planning to have the dental hygiene talk. I’ll tell my children that it’s hard enough to stay on top of regular bills, without adding the dentist’s car payment to the list.

It’s not the first time I’ve made these promises. And they happen elsewhere, too. When I face the doctor at my yearly physical, I promise myself that I will be better at exercising. When we sit down to examine our expenses, I tell myself that I will be better at sticking to a budget. When I reflect on my temple attendance, I vow to do better.

As I reflect on the pattern of promises in my life, I need to know where to file them. Under what category do these hasty resolutions fall? I’m leaning towards repentance. It’s a beautiful and comfortable concept. It’s one of the principles of the gospel that involves much more than acknowledging our wrongdoings (like brushing my teeth while sucking on an atomic fireball and thinking how clever I am). The church website says repentance “is a change of mind and heart that gives us a fresh view about God, about ourselves, and about the world. It includes turning … to God for forgiveness. It is motivated by … the sincere desire to obey [God’s] commandments.”

I don’t remember a commandment about brushing and flossing. But I do remember the summer I had to walk a mile to the dentist office each morning to brush my teeth. I was somewhere around age ten, and answered “yes” when the dentist asked me if I brushed and flossed everyday. That was the cleaning appointment where I scored 13 cavities. My mother asked the dentist if it would be alright with him if I walked to his office everyday, so I could show him outwardly, my inward commitment to caring for my choppers. Lucky for me, my brother didn’t do a whole lot better, so we were walking partners during the dental summer of ’75.

I suppose that having stewardship for our bodies means taking care of our teeth is pleasing to God. I’m grateful for my teeth. And second chances. And time to reflect, and learn from the past. So today, I choose to be thankful for the desire to improve. And for repentance. And for my dentist. And I promise not to kick myself when I’m down. Because the realist in me knows that the sugar thing probably won’t last much past the pie on the buffet tomorrow.

What hasty promises have escaped your lips? Are you as familiar with your dentist as I am with mine? Isn’t it refreshing to be able to apply gospel principles to things like dental floss? What are you grateful for today?

Comments

10 Responses to “A new crown, no prospects of royalty and today’s a new day”

Heidi Bartle
November 25th, 2009 @ 8:19 am

I love applying gospel principles to the mundane tasks of life. I have been mulling over the concept of being worthy versus being perfect, of striving rather than arriving. Lately I have identified things in my life (like laundry) that just aren’t working, and feel liberated as I give myself permission to try another way. It is comforting to know that the Atonement not only makes up for my mistakes, but enables me to do better.
Shirley
November 25th, 2009 @ 9:35 am

I have always been diligent in caring for my teeth, but as a young child and gal, I know I didn’t floss much, although I did floss my teeth. My parents always brought us to the dentist every six months for a cleaning and examination. Then in 1980, I had a total gingivectomy for gingivitis which is an inflammation of the gums and causes pockets between the gums and teeth. The surgery took three hours in the OR under general anesthesia. I had many stitches in my gums as well as some awful tasting hard dressing. When the dressing came off and the stitches came out and I was able, I started a very scrutinized dental care program–I flossed in the morning before I went to work, after breakfast, after lunch, and at bedtime. I use a battery-operated toothbrush which I love. I continue this regimen pretty much every day. I’ve had several crowns because of teeth fracturing–old fillings that needed to be replaced and if the tooth was too fragile, it would break off and therefore a crown or an onlay. I’ve also had implants due to a fall and losing three of my front teeth, and these are cared for as if they were natural teeth. The only teeth I have lost other than the front teeth in the accident, are my wisdom teeth. Other than that, I have all of my teeth which I care for diligently–nothing better than your own, believe me. I wore a partial denture for two years before I could get my implants, and the denture was not a choice I wanted for myself. The implants were very expensive, but worth every penny to me to have as “natural” a look and feel as possible. So all of you out there who are “afraid” of the dentist–don’t be. They are there to help you care for a very important part of your body. I love my dentist and am very grateful and thankful to him and to the surgical periodontist who gave me back my smile.
jendoop
November 25th, 2009 @ 9:38 am

For me these type of thoughts became overwhelming at one point in my life. I felt I had so much to do to become better that I couldn’t do it all. It was emotionally and spiritually painful as I felt guilt almost constantly. But since then I learned that I have to work on things slowly, often one at a time. And what that one thing is must be decided on by counseling with God through prayer. Being able to change slowly, at our human pace, is part of the mercy of God.

Now I understand repentance better. I know it is REAL. We can really fully leave sins behind us, we can become more like Christ.

This whole month I’ve been posting on my blog something I am grateful for each day. It has been such a great experience, the spirit has been stronger in my life, I have been happier and more motivated. Just before I came to Segullah this morning I posted about my gratitude for being a Mormon!
corktree
November 25th, 2009 @ 11:56 am

This hits pretty close to home lately (and not just because we recently spent $2000 on dental restorative work for my girls – we’re not very diligent with flossing around here). I’m frequently guilty of re-committing myself to the same improvement attempts week after week. Flossing is among them, but more seriously, I’ve had trouble getting back on track with scripture study and regular prayer. Just as with my dental hygiene, I do great for a day or two, but can’t seem to make the habit stick. I’m considering an early New Years type resolution starting next week when my daughter goes back to school from her track break. Sometimes I think we need to completely shift gears and attack a problem area from a whole new angle in order to be successful in holding on to change.
Strollerblader
November 25th, 2009 @ 12:31 pm

Ugh, flossing! The thorn in my side. My flossing habits have been seriously hanging over my head for at least the last 5 years. Flossing has been one of my New Year’s Resolutions each of those years. I have kept charts and stats. I have bought the dentist’s preferred floss. I have kept separate floss in my car, purse, and 2 spots in my bathroom. I made one of my friends listen to a 10 minute rant from me about how lame I am at flossing and how I am never going to get it right. This year, I tweaked it and made “a perfect month of flossing” one of my goals. And guess what? I finally did it in May. Yeah, me! I had decided in the later months of last year that I was never going to get into heaven based on my flossing, and decided that if mediocrity (or rather, less than 100%, but more than %50) was the best I could do, then I’d better just keep at it and accept that I was (am) never going to be a perfect flosser in this life. I have not had any perfect months flossing since then.

I think that that is the essence of a lot of things in this life. (And recently discussed here already.) We give what we can, but know that we can’t do 100% in everything. It’s the acceptance of mediocrity or just-OK-ness that is part of enduring to the end rather than tossing the whole effort out and accomplishing absolutely nothing in that area. It’s rejecting all-or-nothing thinking. It’s giving what we can, and letting God, the atonement, and time make up for the rest, if it even matters that much to start with.

I love the opportunities each January (and when school starts each year, as well), to evaluate where I am, where I want to go, and some of the steps I need to work on to get there. It’s OK with me if many of those goals keep getting put back on the list year after year. Year after year, I keep getting closer to meeting my goal, or at the least, the goal doesn’t get forgotten never to be considered again.

I am so grateful for many things. One of my favorites right now is how wonderful it is to read many friends’ daily “Thankful Posts” that remind me of even more things that I am thankful for. We have a yearly tradition here, now in its 7th year, of starting a “Thankful Tree” on the first Monday of November, where we each write something everyday that we’re thankful for on a leaf of a painted tree poster up through Thanksgiving Day. I have all of the previous years’ posters displayed, too. They are a great way to keep mindful of all the blessings we have, plus they provide a fun “snapshot” of our lives at that point in time.

Just a handful of things I’m thankful for: my family, the Spirit, prayer, the priesthood, temples, the scriptures, my patriarchal blessing, loving, caring friends and family, people to inspire me and cheer me on, my body, my health, our home, beds, carpet, lots of shoes to choose from, food to eat, our cars, our nation, faith, my testimony, hugs from my kids, people to talk to, our washing machine, vacuum, and dishwasher, ice cream, chocolate, naps, and long, hot showers.
Jenny
November 25th, 2009 @ 4:06 pm

Heidi, I had that same comforting thought about the atonement. It’s the best insurance policy.
jendoop, the daily gratitude post is such a great way to focus on the positive.
strollerblader: WOW! A whole month of perfect flossing! You’re my hero.
Becky Orton
November 25th, 2009 @ 8:36 pm

Loved reading your perspective Jen. I’ve always felt for you and your not-so-great teeth. I know a lot of it probably has to do with genes because I’m sure I’m no better than you, but my teeth have not caused me as much trouble. (and for that I am thankful) I love the way you applied it to gospel principles. Thanks for sharing this. xoxo
m&m
November 26th, 2009 @ 1:31 am

I am grateful for this post.

This year, I have come to understand more about the idea that the mean and nasty voice in my head that has almost instinctively trapped me in paralyzing guilt for most of my life has not been God’s voice. Well, duh. And yet, when that is all you have really known inside, it’s amazing to come to feel what the Atonement’s hope really feels like, what that voice of invitation to repent really sounds like.

So, I’m grateful for more understanding about the Atonement that has distilled in my life this past year.
Kathryn Soper
November 26th, 2009 @ 8:43 am

Happy Thanksgiving, Jenny, from the queen of hasty self-promises.
Melissa M.
November 26th, 2009 @ 11:02 am

Jenny, this was a lovely and thought=provoking post. You’ve given me much to contemplate on this day of giving thanks. Happy Thanksgiving!