Disciplining a two-and-a-half-year old may be one of those challenges that binds us all together in the life to come.
ME: Cole, put it down. If you hit Margaret on the head with that again then you have to go to time out.
Whack.
MAGS: Mooooom, he hit me again.
ME: Okay Cole, time out. Go to your room and I’ll tell you when you can come out.
COLE: Otay mommy.
He walks by with a grin on his face and a twinkle in his eye.
COLE: Don’t forget to set the beeper!
His cheerful voice calls out from the bedroom as he climbs onto his bed.
Glad to see my tactics are having such an impact.
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That’s exactly why we changed time-out to a chair, and we set it right in between the kitchen and the family room. No one is allowed to talk to the time-out person, and the time-out person is not allowed to talk. If the time-out person does talk, more time is added to their time-out. They hate it! The worst part is still being able to watch what everyone else amid their activities and being uable to participate.
It works wonders!
The chair idea is a good one. It always worked well for me to say they were to think about what they did and when they were ready to come out of time out and stop hitting (or whatever offense they had committed) then they could decide when time out was over. If they then repeated the offense they had to go back in and I decided how long it would be. In any case their “rehabilitation” depended on some show of contrition.
Having said that, when the kids had already been taught not to hit and did it anyway one time would be enough. There wouldn’t be a second time. No warnings were necessary.
Stuff that works on one kid doesn’t work on another kid. That’s just the way kids are.
My oldest will just wilt if you bring on the negative attention, lecture her, and even just glare at her.
My second actually enjoys the attention this method brings about. For her, you’re better off just banishing her to a room and ignoring her - which she absolutely hates. But my oldest is a solitary and contemplative kid, who enjoys living inside her own imagination. So “go to your room” is actually a relief for her and gives her precious time away from her attention-demanding younger sister.
My youngest boy is in a phase where he’s starting to pinch, bite and pull for what he wants. In his case a good thump on the head - just enough to hurt - works best (as long as mom and dad remain in control and restrained when doing it). Nothing else really gets through to him.
Different strokes.
I made a time-out button from cardboard with yarn around it to be worn like a necklace. It said, “Please do not talk to me, I am having a time out. Then they sat on a chair with nothing to do. They enjoyed their rooms too much to make that a punishment. Mine also could get up when they could apologize, state why they had gotten the time-out, and would stop the behaviour. Like whining. I hate whining.
What is it with the second child. My first one really knew I meant it when I said the words “time out”. But I am experiencing the exact same thing with the next child of 2 1/2. Ahhhh. I guess I will have to wait out these terrible twos until August when she turns 3. And here I am bringing #3 into the world to have fun with this all over again!!!
I will never forget when a friend of mine told everyone in our ward over the pulpit that her husband had sent their daughter to time out for being naughty and her (my friend) to time out for losing her temper over it.
Sometimes I need a time out, too. But if I ever got one I hope someone would forget to set the beeper. I’d take a big long nap!
I’m so glad to read this post and to see that other people are going through the same things with their 2 1/2 year olds. I have had my fill of screaming, tantrums, and attitude this week. Thanks for making me feel like I’m not alone!
Oh that one! He’s hilarious…sometimes you just have to shake your head and laugh.
Make and Take-
No! The 3’s are worse! From about 2 1/2 to 3 1/2 are the “terrible two’s” (actually, I like to call them the “undreasonable three’s”). And every one of my kid goes through their own version of it.
Dalene-
I have put myself in several time-outs.
Thanks everyone for the ideas to strategize and change my time out tactics and for feeling the frustration with me. I have given myself time outs too, when I just need a breather, but like Dalene I find I’d be even more refreshed if it could be a big long nap!
And you’re right miggy, I do shake my head and laugh because he is stinkin’ funny. Though I try to do it when he’s not looking, so he’ll take me seriously.