You probably don’t know this about me, but I am a product of what has been dubbed “one of the most heartbreaking episodes of in the annals of Mormon polygamy.” Or something like that.
I became curious about my great great grandmother after reading Margaret Blair Young and Darius Aidan Gray’s One More River to Cross, which mentioned her a few times. Frankly I was proud to read that she had been both friend and advocate of the early African American saints (especially since others of my predecessors have at times been less enlightened).
In my mind, her name is always the way it appears on my pedigree chart, Zina Diantha Huntington Jacobs, But she is better known in the church as Zina Diantha Huntington (Jacobs) (Smith) Young. Mostly what I knew about her was that some of her life choices generated a lot of controversy. But I wanted to know more, so I picked up a book called The Four Zinas: A Story of Mothers and Daughters on the Western Frontier (the beautiful babe she refers to was my great grandfather).
In short, what I learned about her was that Zina–like so many of her contemporaries–was an amazing woman who endured what seem to me to be unbearable hardships yet still managed to accomplish great things. In addition to being a daughter, sister, wife, mother and sister wife; she was the third president of the General Relief Society, president of the silk industry (I loved reading about how this was not a position she particularly relished–she really loathed those silkworms), social activist, midwife and so much more.
Much of what I read was incredibly humbling to me. Zina worked so hard in such difficult circumstances (no central air, no Toyota Sienna, no World Wide Web) and gave so much for conveniences I easily take for granted (the opportunity to drive two blocks away in order to arrive late to church or to stand in line for an hour to say my piece about who gets to be President). She gave birth without an epidural in a wagon stuck in the mud on the banks of a river she had to cross soon after though it was dangerously swollen with rain. And the company moved on the very next day.
Other aspects of Zina’s character–her willingness to stand up for what she believed, her advocacy for women (what I see as a form of early feminism–would my use of that term offend her? I hope not!), and her desire to serve– make me wonder if perhaps she is the source of my own inclinations to do the same. Although admittedly my tiny efforts pale next to her long list of accomplishments and lifetime of service.
Another impressive quality is how she seemingly reconciled two views that appear so conflicting to me and to many of the women I know. As I said, Zina worked hard to promote the rights, interests and voices of women. Yet she also had, by personal revelation, a firm testimony of polygamy*. In spite of the controversy surrounding her marriages, based on her history and her writings it does not at all seem Zina was a victim of her circumstances. No one forced her hand. In fact she refused a request for marriage more than once before she received revelation to marry again.
One of my favorite stories was of when Zina attended a conference on women’s issues that was held back east. A stranger approached her and looked her up and down then reportedly stated, “Hmmph! You certainly don’t look oppressed.” From what I read of her life, Zina seemed to me to be a strong and powerful woman. Oppressed she was not. She was constant in her efforts to serve and empower women and still managed to stand firm in her testimony of her personal witness regarding polygamy.
I sometimes find myself conflicted between how things are and how they should be or what I know and want and what the world tells me I should want. I struggle with the wide chasm between who I am and who I want to be. So I have great respect for a woman who remained firm in her knowledge and faith even in two seemingly conflicting aspects of her own life. I won’t pretend to understand why she made some of the hard choices she did–I wasn’t there and I wasn’t in her shoes. But Zina was a remarkable woman. Knowing more about her and from whence I came inspires me.
Tell me about some of the women in your past–well behaved or otherwise–who’ve influenced your life.
*Please note: I am not in any way advocating polygamy. I’m merely
making an observation about one woman’s perspective and experience
regarding it.
Dalene–I want to know about the controversy (I got some hints, but I want to know MORE…)
I love my mom’s sisters. They are spunky and dingy and artistic and realistic, they are lazy and crazy and ambitious. They have stuck with husbands who didn’t “deserve” it and they have left husbands who didn’t deserve it. They’re not perfect but they are themselves. There are 7 girls in my mom’s family and each of them make me think I can do this Mormon-woman-thing with more grace and style and laughter than I thought possible.
Thanks, Dalene. What a great post. Even though issues change, some principles do not. Faith, personal revelation, obedience, loyalty, sacrifice, growth because of hardship. I’m so grateful I get to practice these principles now–not then–but I am thankful for those who came before me.
(And by “practice,” I mean, “try, try again not always successfully.”
Afterthought: I think that’s a timeless principle too.)
The controversy: Zina Diantha Huntington had more than one husband. She’s one of the few cases of polyandry in our history. While her first husband, Henry Jacobs was courting her, Joseph Smith Jr. asked her (several times) to become one of his plural wives. She refused and married Henry. But, after her marriage to Henry, she agreed to be married to Joseph and was sealed to him. More difficult: After Joseph’s death, his plural marriages were resealed in the finished Nauvoo Temple–Brigham stood proxy for Joseph, therefore Zina ended up married to Brigham for time, though Henry was there as a witness. Henry was a member in good standing–Brigham sent him away on missions, Zina ends up married to Brigham instead of Henry. It is all very hard to understand–it’s a mess. Zina’s first children are with Henry, and there are many descendants in the church today. Her last child, a daughter named Zina, is with Brigham.
You can read more about it at FAIR. Though I recommend books In Sacred Loneliness and 4 Zinas.
Zina was known as the heart of the Relief Society, where Eliza was its mind. I have no doubt she was a remarkable woman, but it does make me sour that her having such a wide influence comes from the fact she was in Brigham Young’s household. And the fact her daughter did so well in Cardston really is because she inherited a portion of Brigham Young’s money. The Zinas may not have looked oppressed, but they were hardly typical of life in polygamy. They were privileged examples of polygamy.
At least they used their privilege well. They were hardworking, lived lives of service. yes, they defended polygamy, but Zina Diantha also built hospitals and built a network of trained midwives, and Zina her daughter did more for Cardston than her husband Charles Card. Which is why I named my daughter Zina.
The woman who I am named after was the only nurse in a small town where she lived. She delivered every single baby born in that town and never lost one! She also stayed with the mother for a few weeks to help until the mother was well enough to fully take over.
I get faint at the sight of blood and have never delivered a wee babe. I don’t continue her legacy.
I can’t help it . .. I love that she was married to more than one man at once. I won’t go into the why’s and wherefores, but I really love it.
Dalene, this post moved me to tears. Partially because I know you and because I often feel the power of your heritage and your goodness. But more because it is a beautiful thing to find oneself in one’s ancestry and to claim the gifts that genes and spiritual bonds deliver to us at our birth. Beautiful indeed.
Sarah Pippen Jolly - one of my not-sure-how-many-greats grandmothers. She crossed the plains with eleven children because her husband died within weeks of their leaving the East. She is a woman of valor, courage, strength. She is also a poet. I am convinced that she is part of why I possess some of the same qualities.
Johnna is correct. It is all very messy, which is why I didn’t elaborate. And since so much of the history can become skewed depending on who is doing the telling, I gave up on trying to figure out what really happened or why. But I like your point about privilege, Johnna. I feel very privileged in my own life and I want to use my privilege well.
Maralise–there is something forever endearing about a good aunt (or six).
Carrie–that “try, try again” principle is timeless. I’d be in a heap of trouble if it weren’t.
Cardine–I’m standing–or really sitting with my head between my knees–with you in the fainting-at-the-sight-of-blood camp. It’s a good thing we both have other qualities, right?!
Melody–I want to read more about Sarah Pippen Jolly. Do you have any of her poems?
Zina’s story is heartbreaking. There are aspects of polygamy that I can accept, but reading about poor Henry separated from his wife and children first by Joseph and then Brigham makes no sense to me. I’m glad that she was apparently at peace, and I hope there are mitigating factors that I can’t see from here.
The ancestor I feel a special connection to is Mary Fielding Smith. I felt it before realizing I was a direct descendent. I continue to be in awe of her mix of strength, spirit, testimony, and obedience.
I love reading Mormon women’s history. I have had a couple of out of print books on early sisters loaned to me this week, and I have loved every moment of reading. One of the most powerful impressions for me has been the contrast between the way Mormon women experienced their religion and the way they were portrayed in the national media by anti-polygamy activists. The anti-polygamy movement was fueled by those with ulterior motives, primarily breaking into the exclusive economic and political systems in Utah, and much propaganda was used to turn the national sentiment against the Mormon Church. It is interesting that those who claimed to be interested to helping poor, oppressed Utah women did exactly the opposite once laws in their favor were passed. One example, husbands could be convicted of cohabitation for providing financial support of practical assistance to their plural wives even if they were no longer sharing an intimate life. Sadly, the misperceptions of Mormon women put forth in that period (undeducated, degraded, oppressed, etc ) have continued in the national consciousness, and to some extent in our own perceptions of our history.
Great post, Dalene. Zina is such a great example in many ways; and yet, it’s hard to praise her without sounding either positive towards the weird circumstances she dealt with, or incredibly harsh towards Joseph Smith and Brigham Young (who created some of the difficulties that Zina dealt with). You’ve struck a very good balance here, I think. And you draw from a great source — 4 Zinas is an inspiring book.
My only quibble is with your suggestion that polygamy be reinstated . . .
I don’t have ancestors who lived in Nauvoo. In fact, I am related to a number of fiery baptists living in Missouri at the time when there was considerable tension with the Mormons. I like to think that there are several people rolling in their graves as they see their posterity, members of the very church they disliked.
My great-great grandmother emigrated from Ireland in the mid-1800’s when she was a teenager. She got married and moved out west with her husband. Rumor has it that she was a hard woman to live with, very picky and difficult. Her husband, my great-great grandfather apparently had enough and also suffered from a touch of gold fever because he went galivanting off to the Yukon when he was 50. He disappeared in Alaska somewhere.
What I love about this is… that you do good things yourself. It always makes me happy to see people who have some good/some bad stuff in ancestry - but the people don’t sit on their ancestors laurels and don’t do anything. I’m a fan of doers.
Women… The women I came from are simply amazing. Reading back about China and the struggles women had to deal with - leave me standing in awe and wonder at what they lived through and overcame. To be a woman is to be part of a great group of giants - it is our responsibility to do likewise for our girlies. ROAR!
I’m amazed at my mother, who eschewed her staunch catholic upbringing and joined the revolution of the gospel.
I wonder how much of our polygamous history is more “oops” than anything else.
Zina’s polyandry story reminds me of when Joseph received the revelation of baptism for the dead, and the Saints went right out into the river and started baptizing each other for their dead family members. Males for females, females for males, no one keeping track of who did what for whom… till finally the Lord said “STOP, you’re not doing it right” and put a few more rules in place.
I wonder, exactly what did Joseph and Brigham know about celestial marriage at the point this was going on? They knew it was a commandment, but had the kinks been ironed out yet? Seems like things were pretty messed up until the Saints moved to Utah and figured out that polygyny was a little “cleaner” than polyandry… so to speak.
My mom’s sweet little fiery generous STRONG self inspires me.
While I have pioneer stock on my mother’s side, on my dad’s side, I’m only 4th generation. My Nana inspires me because she a bit of a pioneer. She served a mission at nineteen. (She was the first female called from Texas.) She married a man her mission president recommended to her when she was ending her mission. But he turned out to be a bank robber, so she got that marriage annulled asap. (I really ought to post about the trip from Texas to Salt Lake and back–he was always making the quick side trips, leaving her alone in a hotel…)
Her next husband she chose herself. He wasn’t LDS, but he was a very supportive husband. She raised her sons in the church. Her husband died when my dad was only 16, so she became a single mom. The sons went on missions and married in the temple. Her faith never wavered, and was active in the church until she died. It’s not nearly as exciting as Zina (bank robbery notwithstanding), but she has had an incredible influence on my life.
Thank you Dalene and Natalie. My aunt will be 91 in a couple of weeks. She is an amazing woman. Her first husband died in WWII. They weren’t married very long. Her second marriage lasted beyond 30 years and her husband died of a degenerative disease that gradually robbed him of all his faculties. Over the three years or so that he gradually deteriorated she kept him at home and took care of him herself. She has been widow for more than ten years now. Her social calendar is always full. She still gives her dinner parties, goes to the symphony and works out at the gym every day.
When my siblings and I were growing up she was at every baptism, graduation, mission farewell and marriage. She has such a positive outlook. I hope I can age as gracefully.
Thanks for this, Dalene.
I have polygamous ancestors on both sides. In fact, just this Memorial Day at the cemetery, we discovered that one of my ancestors had an additional wife we had known nothing about. She was looking for his grave, and we’d never heard of that branch of the family before. I will be glad for the day when I see eye to eye with these women and understand where they were coming from better.
My grandmothers are both sources of strength to me, in different ways. One of them did yoga for many years and climbed to the top of Timpanogos in her seventies; the other never forgets a birthday or an anniversary for her sixty or so kids, grandkids, and great-grandkids. She stays connected. I’m grateful for her example, even though that is not my strength.
I love how the responses to this post have described women in our family trees who we admire or who have influenced us. My great-great grandmother, Celeste Peterson, is depicted in a sculpture by Arvard Fairbanks titled “National Shrine to Love and Devotion”. It is housed in the Fairview City, UT Museum. Celeste and her husband Peter, were married for 82 years (each lived to be over 100 and at the time, were the oldest living married couple in the country). I observed how much my grandparents adored and enjoyed each other and see the same thing with my parents. Just yesterday my father casually said “I have something to tell you - I really love your mom.” I love the examples of long and happy marriages in my family and I hope that mine can be just the same!
I have so many stories to share, and no room to share them. My great-grandparents were pioneers and moved to Canada after their parents and grandparents had gone to SLC from Nauvoo. I get lost in their stories when I read them, but I don’t talk about it much. I love this post because it has giving me a longing to share more of what I’ve learned. I think I’ll have to start doing that in the near future…
Dalene- I know that Zina is incredibly proud of you. You carry on your heritage with warmth, class and style.
I too have loved reading all your stories. Thank you for being willing to share!
Kaimi–good one. You had me actually rereading my post for a moment and then I realized you were just teasing.
Cheryl–oh do share! I have to tell you how I learned why it is important to tell them over and over again. I was sitting in RS one pioneer day and for the lesson they had sisters in the ward get up and tell some of their pioneer stories. Imagine my surprise when one woman started telling the story of Henry Chariton Jacobs being born on the banks of the Chariton River! I went up to her and said “That’s my story, too!” and we realized we were distant cousins! (That’s actually happened twice now.) I never would have realized if I hadn’t heard my grandfather telling me over and over again about his dad.
Suedonym–thanks friend!
Mary Ann Angell (Young) my great+ grandmother.
There are so many tales of her fieriness, her healing her children (uhm, by laying on of hands,) the wagon trek, that she was the first wife of B.Y., Mary Ann is endlessly fascinating to me. She just fits with the extraordinary early history of the church, the great tumbling forth of revelations, and the as Natalie put it so wisely, all those kinks being ironed out.
Azúcar, your comment reminded me of something. Despite my personal feelings about polygamy, I am intrigued by the relationships of sister wives. I know there were heartbreaks and hardships, but I also know there were friendships. So it’s always interesting to me when I learn that a friend of mine is a descendant of one of Brigham Young’s wives. I think about the threads once woven together between sister wives, then separated, and eventually crossing again generations later when descendants’ paths cross.
Dalene, there are some women in my life who I’d love to share a home with. Getting to live with your girlfriends all the time? Could be nice. It’s just the sharing your husband part that hangs me up. I totally get the girl connection.
Okay, now I am sure people are going to start throwing rocks at me with this comment, but I’m not that bugged by the whole polygamy thing. Maybe because I think that it solves a lot of problems in the hereafter. (not sure what I think of it in this life) My dad’s first wife died, leaving him with three very young daughters. He married my Mom 2 years later. He is sealed to both women. Why should my dad have to choose between two great women? I don’t worry about it because I know that it will all be okay.
My great-grandmother, Maria (pronounced Mariah) Bushman Smith was the second wife of Silas Derryfield Smith. She bore nine children — all after the Manifesto. She mostly raised her children alone and in abject poverty. She raised them to be highly educated, articulate, clean and well groomed and dignified. My grandmother was a trained artist (mostly watercolors), played tennis and hiked and was an accomplished pianist. She earned a degree from Brigham Young Academy (now University) in 1917. Maria started the first kindergarten in Arizona and began the church’s gathering of records at the National Archives in Washington, D.C. As a newlywed she lived in a two room house. Each wife had one room as her home.
I get chills down my spine as I read your stories of your great female ancestors. I feel the POWER of women, especially the power of women connected by love and faith across generations.
When William Walton Burton, one of my I-can’t-remember-how-many great grandfathers, asked his first wife to marry him, she agreed on one condition: that he marry her sister as well. Apparently, he was a bit hesitant about the idea at first. As it turned out, he married not only this first wife, but two of her sisters as well. My next door neighbor growing up, who lived in Melody’s house, came from one of those sisters and I came from another. It’s amazing to me how well they made polygamy work. And I always thought it was cool that one of my dearest friends was also my third cousin.
So what you are saying is that she was like the feminists of our own time.
She owned her own sexuality although it may not have been in the wisest of ways or even the most responsible of ways in the greater picture at-large, in the greater community at large. Depending on who you asked.
She saw value in her life’s work outside the home.
She had a sense of sdventure and was willing to make her life’s work take place in difficult places in difficult times. One woman’s wagon ( or silk worm farm) is another woman’s AIDS infected African hut Hospital, to clarify.
She owned her own life despite what protest against it existed. And she felt justified.
She didn’t look like the devil to her critics anymore than a modern day feminist does.
She chose not to wear oppression but fight it.
She saw herself as part of a sisterhood she could lead and felt obliged to serve.
Any more you can think of?
She was a staunch advocate for other women. That is the quality I most admire about her and that most inspires me.
I always love that in a woman too.