One of the best stories from this period that I know is Mormon Odyssey: The Story of Ida Hunt Udall, Plural Wife edited by Maria Ellsworth. This book was given the Mormon History Association’s award for best biography of the year in 1993. From the review at buy.com:

“Mormon Odyssey is the captivating story of Ida Hunt Udall, a plural wife of David K. Udall, an early Mormon leader in Arizona. Her story is told through her memories of her early life, her journal…and selected letters. Born in 1858, Ida Hunt Udall began her Mormon odyssey when she was quite young, pioneering with her family in Utah, New Mexico, and Arizona. With the coming of the anti-Mormon crusade focusing on polygamists, Ida was forced to go into hiding soon after her marriage in 1882. She vividly describes her marriage, her life on the “underground” and the prison experiences of her husband as reported to her in letters she copied into her journal. Maria Ellsworth, Ida’s granddaughter, weaves these materials into a compelling tale of hard work, courage, sacrifice, and devotion to a family, a religion, and a cause that defined her being and gave meaning to her life. She includes details of Ida’s life based on the journals of Ida’s sisters, family recollections, and historical documents. Mormon Odyssey provides a ‘window’ on polygamy, with all its conflicts and disappointments, as well as its rewards. Here are keen insights into pioneer life in Arizona from the 1880s to 1915. The book will appeal to those interested in family history, Mormon history, frontier history, and women’s history.”

Interestingly enough, Udall lived in the same community as Romney (St. Johns, Arizona). She was also a second wife (though you learn much about the first wife and the related challenges). I truly enjoyed the first-person point of view; she wrote in her journal, and it’s up to your own interpretation.

Polygamy was an issue I struggled to understand during high school/college, and my seminary teacher told me to push it to the back burner, which I did. When it came time to serve a mission, however, I knew I would be confronted about the topic, and wanted to be able to say what I felt/knew about it from my heart. So, on the 10-hour drive to the MTC, I read this book, reading much of it out loud to my parents. Not only did it help me understand and appreciate those who lived the law of plural marriage, but my testimony grew and I was inspired by their conviction, hope, and unfailing recognition of God’s hand in all things. Do I completely “get” polygamy after reading this? No, not really, but it certainly doesn’t bother me like it did. If you’ve heard the quote “Feed your faith and your doubts will starve to death,” (sorry, I don’t know who said it), that’s what my experience was like. I had doubts, and although they weren’t completely resolved, reading that book surely “fed” my faith, helping those doubts diminish greatly.

Wendy, I agree that the truth–the whole truth, with lots of mercy in there, since that is true–makes us free.

Martha, what a great story. I am glad you shared it–thank you.

And then, just a few years ago, my dad sent me a two volume family history of my great grandfather, James Henry Denning, who had two wives and ended up serving a jail sentence for polygamy around the time of the Manifesto. My great grandmother, Emma Jane Celestia Squires, was his second wife. She endured things like living in a dugout in southeastern Idaho trying to keep her children alive during the winter when it was so cold she had to chip away the layer of ice from her door to get outside. Or hiding behind a false wall in her sister wife’s home like a fugitive. Or like being forced to testify in court. I thought, how could anyone WANT to live that way unless they had an AMAZING testimony that it was God’s will?

She had 12 or 13 children (mostly girls) and my grandma was one of the youngest. How I wish she was still alive today (she died when I was 14) so I could ask her what it was like growing up that way! She never spoke of herself as being the daughter of a polygamous family. I’m not sure if it was because it was sort of “swept under the carpet” or if it was just normal life to her. Probably some of both.

These stories definitely need to be told.

While it may shake some people to know more about our church’s history, I think if the information were presented by the church, it would do a lot more good than harm, especially considering the tremendous amount of tainted information that is presented by antagonists.

I loved the little snippet about Catharine’s son, Claude. Long road trips are tough with kids! And I’ve never even thought what that would be like to cross the plains with little buggers! Funny!

(And true…)

About others, I don’t know. The first month of my mission was hellish because of deep apostasy among the missionaries there. It was awful. I’ve never had a worse month. To tell that story truly, I’d have to speak ill of someone, even if I gave them a fake name. I’d rather not do that. So, it’s a tough call.

Tiffany, I also wish we did not silence the women living in polygamous marriages. They’re a part of our history too. There must be a better way to deal with that than what we do now.

I also feel stronger when I write–as I write and rewrite, I figure out the truth of my life.

Justine, that “pretend intimacy” is absolutely right. It’s the same problem I have with ropes courses–total tangent, but when I’ve done them they have created this illusion that because we completed some course together we are now bonded, but it isn’t really true.
Same with writing, in a way.

And I do think that everyone has something they need to heal from… everyone I know, anyway. They might not need to heal by writing, but they need to heal some other way. I think the most powerful writing faces the pain and works through it to joy, or, if not joy, then at least healing…

Thanks to all for your thoughtful responses!

I think “story-telling” is one of the most profound characteristics of Mormon writing. It distinguishes us as a culture and religion. So much of our writing,whether its collections of essays like 18 Months, or fiction novels like The Giant Joshua, or whatever it may be–Mormons write about their past to do exactly what you said: connect, heal, learn. I also feel like Celebration is another big reason we write the way we do. There is so much to rejoice about when we think about our heritage, our present experiences, and our future.

In both the act of writing, and the act of reading, these things are realized I think. Writing about my mission has been a much longer process than I imagined it would. Most of what I have is unfinished because I don’t think I’ve made closure with a number of things, and trying to write about them has caused me to just sit there holding my pen, with unfinished sentences and thoughts.

I still haven’t come to terms with bishop who let his best friend be a counselor in his bishopric, even though he didn’t live in the ward boundaries, because he was in an adulterous relationship and didn’t want to show up at his own ward. Or, the branch president who spread rumours about our investigators and made the whole ward believe they were something they were not, causing 0 attendance at their baptisms.

At times I feel like the convert who doesn’t go to church because they don’t understand that people aren’t perfect. You could say I’m the writer who doesn’t write because I can’t find the answers.

Thanks for this post, Emily.

Emily, great reading! Do you think we all need to heal from our past? Does everyone have something painful to overcome? It’s an interesting subject.

As for books about abuse, they are too hard for me to read. My sister was sexually abused. I just can’t stomach reading about other children being abused. It’s too hard. But applaud those who have the courage to write about their abusive childhoods and show healing.

I find writing to be profoundly healing. I’ve been going through some tough times this summer. And, when I stopped writing, my ability to cope faded. When I returned to writing, I felt a lot more strength in my life.

It gets even more thorny when your writing has the potential to embarrass others. On the whole, I was probably much more honest about myself than I was about certain companions and members.