A couple years back I used to spend a large amount of time and emotion on internet infertility forums. Women would write in and ask questions, admit defeat and discuss radical treatments. You know how it goes, you lurk on a forum like that and the next thing you know your really concerned that Babyorbust21’s hormonal therapy might go awry if she doesn’t stop obsessing over coffee.
There was a certain thread though that none of us baby-seeking females could stop reading. It was called the Pregnancy Signs thread. Women would explain in almost scary detail, the physical and emotional symptoms they felt after conception, before they took pregnancy tests.
Day 1 after conception: Gassy
Day 2 after conception: Breast Tenderness and gassy.
Day 3 after conception: Brushed my teeth, wanted to puke.
Day 4 after conception: Still gassy. And ornery.
You see how it goes….
The whole concept was of the devil. I am sure there was a whole load of us hopefuls that would be driving down the road, feel twinge of pain in our chests and know it was though an angel had personally announced the arrival of motherhood. Before our cycle was up, we had branded ourselves pregnant judging by the thread. It wasn’t that we ate beans, it was because we were in the family way. When the devastating day arrived and we discovered we really weren’t pregnant–the thread had fooled us–the disappointment was intense. No, really that whole idea was cooked up in hell’s kitchen by the devil.
Eventually I stopped reading the thread and turned away. I haven’t stopped asking people in my life their stories though. My older sister gets eye twitches. My mother would get bored. My neighbor feels bloated. Knowing that one never knows how babies will come, I’ve started asking those in my life how they knew they were going to become a parent. My friend had a dream about adoption. My visiting teaching companion prayed and knew she was to try for an IVF.
If you’d like to write your story in our comments, I’d love to read it. And I promise I won’t obsess. But if it includes gas, feel free to leave that part out. I think that’s a given.