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By Justine Dorton

I’m not going to kid you.

Losing weight is NOT a resolution this year.

And neither is less chocolate, more vegetables, less butter, more hymns. None of it.

My New Year’s Resolution this year is one I can absolutely and decidedly FULFILL.

I’m going to be happy.

I’m not setting half-hearted goals that I know I can’t achieve. I’m not setting the bar higher and higher, only to come up shorter and shorter. I’ve tried that. It doesn’t work. Someone told me once that I need to aim for the stars, so I’ll at least reach the moon. Gibberish, I tell ya.

I’m aiming for Hoboken, or maybe Newark. I know I can get there. It’s just down the Jersey Turnpike, which isn’t really that bad a drive.

And getting there, wherever it is I’m going, will make me even happier. Because being happy is something I know I can do. Smiling is just a slight muscle adjustment, pretty simple.

And at this point in my life, it doesn’t really matter what else is thrown at me. I’ve had that darn moon thrown at me, and I find myself still smiling. How hard can it be to keep it going? So, here are some other New Year’s Resolutions I’m going to adopt for this year.

-More reading in bed
-Less worrying about dust
-More snow angels
-Less making beds
-More listening to generous thoughts
-Less looking at my watch

I can do those things. And they might not be the stars or the moon, but I don’t need any fancy planets. I just need to be someplace I wouldn’t mind staying awhile.

Got any reach-the-stars resolutions this year? Got any Newark resolutions? Do share!

About Justine Dorton

Justine is a mother to five children, and has a husband lodged somewhere (probably in the den). She is not very fond of speaking of herself in third person.

18 thoughts on “Resolved”

  1. I'm going to court my husband. Very, very quietly.

    I'm going to do things I want to do.

    I'm going to like myself.

    I am not going to give up.

    I'm going to cry more than I want to, and hopefully just as much as I need to.

    I'm going to run because I love it.

    I'm going to tell my boys all the ways they are wonderful and teach them how to use the washing machine.

    I'm going to cook and eat rhubarb, even though I'm the only one in my house who likes it.

    I am going to enjoy this year!

  2. I'm going to try to take care of me. I'm going to pay more attention to dust bunnies and keep my beds made and the floor swept. I might wash the shower curtain regularly.
    I'm going to waste less time.
    I'm going to be less rigid.
    I might try planning my time better.

    I'm going to survive.

  3. I haven't really decided on resolutions this year. I think one of my only goals will be to go to the temple once each month. I'd rather concentrate on one thing that is simple to do and go from there. And I'm probably not going to eat less chocolate–not ready for that goal yet.

  4. My kids have made it clear they want me to smile more. They want me to smile when my face is at rest.

    I'm going to do that, and work up some cocktail of happy-making practices for me too.

  5. My favorite resolution ever was last year, when I made the goal to have more parties. Truthfully, there were underlying reasons beyond just craving more fun. We felt kind of lonely here in our ward and neighborhood here and longed to make more connections (we're one of a few families with older kids). I wanted to say "yes" more to my kids. And just wanted to welcome more joy!

    Eleven parties later, I can say it worked! And it didn't have that "tsk-tsk" quality many of my past resolutions had.

    Justine, I loved this and I'm right there with you. And I like Kel's first one. Maybe this year I'll focus on wooing/courting my husband more.

  6. Kel, I love your list. I think I'm going to bag mine and adopt yours. πŸ™‚

    All of my resolutions have been centered around what I don't want…I don't want to be overweight, I don't want to be judgmental, I don't want to snap at my children/husband, I don't want…whatever!

    Things I love and want to do more of will be my focus: court my husband, play with my boys, call my parents, have friends over, spend "me" time regularly, and really listen to the women in my life.

    My resolution will be to enjoy 2009.

  7. What a great way to word a resolution, Kel.

    I am going to get rid of a lot of junk…. so I don't have to keep trying to clean it up. πŸ™‚

    Great post, Justine.

  8. Love everyone's resolutions. There is something that gets me when people are striving to improve.

    Im going to:

    Have a baby girl. That's a lot right there.

    Continue making my house organized, beautiful and simple.

    Use games and bookes to teach my 3rd and 4th kids to read and reason better.

    Continue excercising because its fun and makes me feel good. That was last year's resolution, and yippee, I did it, –the whole year!

    Thanks for getting me thinking Justine.

  9. "I’m aiming for Hoboken, or maybe Newark. I know I can get there. It’s just down the Jersey Turnpike, which isn’t really that bad a drive."

    I spent four years commuting this corridor of the NJ turnpike each day. If this is our measure of ease in success, we are all eternally doomed! I still wake up in a cold sweat some nights. You think I'm kidding . . . πŸ˜‰

  10. My list mostly has to do with doing the basics more consistently. I know those will help me be happier.

    I'm also going to be a better team player with my husband. That will make everybody in our house happier.

    I love your list, Justine.

  11. It may be a little selfish of me, but most of my resolutions are geared towards helping me find a little more joy in the journey of my life. In all facets of my life. So:

    I decided at 11:49 pm on Jan. 1st that it wasn't too late to make a goal to read my scriptures every day this year, no matter what. So I started right then. 3for3 so far.

    Learn a new, challenging piece on the piano. This does not mean a hymn πŸ™‚ I haven't decided on what song yet. Any suggestions? Something moving and beautiful?

    Exercise…just wrapped up week three of working out 6 days a week. I'm not sure it's a habit yet. I haven't gotten to the "I want to work out" stage, but I am at least committed to working out. It's a start. And I think it's a key in staving off the blues (though I am partial to blue).

    Take the kids skiing on Fridays. They get out of school earlier, and it's free after 3:00 at Alta. Which I appreciate greatly.

    Eat as a family whenever possible. And as a partial family whenever it's not. Whoever's here, we eat together.

    Start writing again. This will require a leap of courage, but it's therapeutic and highly beneficial.

    Earn $600 by June (outside my [ir]regular flight attendant income)…doing whatever jobs I can come up with on the side or selling some of my stuff online etc.

    Cultivate gratitude. Live in the present day and not in the past or future. Work on unconditional acceptance and love.

  12. I'm not ready to make resolutions yet. Is it OK if I just put it off till February? How 'bout March?

    And Justine, I love the concept of aiming for Hoboken. I always tell my boys that my life goal for them is to become great home teachers.

  13. Michelle, I'll be THRILLED if my sons become great home teachers. And I think that's a much loftier goal than it sounds.

    My joke has been that my one goal this year is to give birth. (Much like what Lee said.) And I actually do think that's PLENTY.

    Other than (or, actually, along with) that, if I just keep plugging away at what's already on my plate, it will keep me very challenged. I *have* been thinking it would be great if we could start doing family council in our family (we've only tried a couple times ever) since I think it might help my older kids to feel less indignant and surprised to find out about chores my husband and I have been plotting for them, etc. I just think it's a good thing to do, yet it's for some reason something we've found very very hard to do.

    Thanks to all of you who shared your goals/resolutions/non-resolutions; they were all fun to read.

  14. (Deborah, I'm right there with you on the NJ turnpike comment. The same stretch of road can take one hour or five… Bleh!)

    I'm liking these lists. Last year I just really had one main goal that I had serious intentions of keeping: find more joy in the everyday. {It's there! It's right there! I just needed to focus a little bit.} I don't want to just survive my life. Other people are happy, gosh darn it! I want to be too. So, gratitude, new perspective, reflection, paying attention to little things {and not in a bad way…}, living-enjoying-revelling in the simple joys of my days; that one goal trickled out and into so many aspects of my life that need a little tweaking, and so, in the end, I really achieved more than I ever set out to do. (What? Did I just say[in the]end? I think I'm going to go for year two. Joy is good. I like it.)


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