In case you haven’t heard (where have you been?) I am with child, or pregnant.
People keep asking questions like “Are you sure?” or “Have you been pregnant before?” which annoys me a bit because no one ever asks my sister-Page-with-eight-children these types of inquiries. To her they ask “Again?” Anyway, I did buy the most expensive pregnancy test money could buy. (When it comes to pregnancy tests I choose quality over quantity.) Besides the positive pregnancy test, I am also as”tired as a day after Disneyland” to quote my sister-in-law Lindsay.
Oh my googles. Does having a baby mean that someday I will be required to go to Disneyland on a regular basis? Or buy their movies? Or clothes? Or FRUIT SNACKS???
I find it hard to explain to my husband what it is like to be pregnant. Instead of doing a lot of conversing about the whole thing, we’ve been watching Indiana Jones movies. It is our happy medium, I guess. Last night it was the Last Crusade. Somewhere in the middle I stopped being engaged because I couldn’t help but give into major anxiety. No one told me about how scary it is to have a baby! There are so many, many things that can happen!
Like a miscarriage.
Or a premature birth.
Or a birth defect.
Or a kidnapping.
Or a broken limb.
Or a broken heart.
And as the movie progressed, so did my mental list of risks we were taking. I had never felt so completely overwhelmed in my life! It felt like emotional claustrophobia!
For my own sanity, I decided to focus on Indiana Jones instead.
Towards the end of the movie, Indie comes to the deathly ravine that impedes his way to the Holy Grail. There is no visible way to cross from one side to another, unless he uses (deep breath) faith. With time running out, he steps out across the great divide, into mid-air, to find that his “leap of faith” lands him on an obscure bridge that can only be seen after the initial step (exhale.)
“That” I whispered in my husband’s ear, “is what it feels like to be pregnant.”
In this brave but risky, courageous while dangerous, hero-type context, I think he understood.
By-the-way, there is an Indiana Jones adventure at Disneyland. Expectant mothers should not ride. But I see that this is no missed opportunity, given the adventure that is incubation.
What a wild ride already. . .