Home

A Matter of Perspective

By Kellie Purcill

This week, I spent nearly a full day by Mum’s bedside in hospital. Her pain was neon intense, as unstoppable as a meteor, and anxiety framed her face more starkly than her sweat slick hair and oxygen tubing. At one point just before her CT scan she gripped my arm so tightly my hand turned purple, pulling me in, close enough that her tears scurried across to explore my face.

“I don’t feel right. It all feels so wrong. So wrong. What’s happening? Please, Kel. Don’t leave me!”

I pulled back a little, so she could see my face and read what I was saying amongst the staccato commands and jargon heavy language of the packed room.

“Mum, it’s the drugs.” She desperately shook her head in denial, wiping away more tears to see me continue. “Mum, I know it doesn’t make sense, but it’s the drugs they’ve given you. The way you feel, how your head feels, it’s normal-“

“- it CAN’T be normal!”

“It IS normal, a known, expected reaction, I promise.”

From somewhere under my arm the doctor agreed “Yes, it’s totally normal!” but Mum’s panicked eyes didn’t waver from my face.

“It’s okay Mum. Trust me.”

It’s all about perspective.

Read More

The Princess and Appease

By Brooke Benton

“I envy my dad and his faith. I envy all people who have someone to beseech, who know where they’re going, who sleep under the fluffy white comforter of belief.”
Kelly Corrigan (The Middle Place)

 

The first time I read this quote I was a little bit bothered. The idea that faith was akin to crawling under my covers, into my bed, moments before my head hit the pillow and my eyes closed tightly set for a slumbering destination was too simplistic for me. The notion of believing seemed dumbed down… easing into bed as means to a testimony? Ha! Finding my faith was a difficult road because I was a difficult girl. I wondered too much and questioned even more: am I feeling the Spirit? Or is it fear or nostalgia? Am I telling myself a too-good-to-be-true fairy tale, a fantasy to ease my troubled soul and remind me of my childhood bathed in Mormon affirmation?

Read More