Addressing Halloween Impoliteness: Increase Compassion

For the second year, I set up a folding table in my driveway to greet Halloween goblins. I don’t know many of my neighbors in our large development that sees 100 plus Trick-or-Treaters on Halloween. However, I want to do my part to return the favor since that many people worked to decorate and hand out candy to my children years ago.

More than offering a repayment of candy debt, I wanted to help bring some normalcy, routine, and festivity to children who are experiencing hardships due to lockdowns, masks, parents’ changing work routines, and illness among their caregivers—at daycare, school, or within their extended family.

As the sun descended and a parade of children came to my driveway, I did notice that these children were a little more sullen than in previous years. They were also less likely to say, “Trick or Treat” or “Thank you.” The next day, some people on my neighborhood Facebook page pointed this out as well.

My interpretation? These children have had fewer interactions with people outside of their own living rooms. Certainly, these living rooms have witnessed a significant increase in anxiety and depression in every family member over what might be 20% to 100% of these toddlers and school-aged kids’ lives.

While I did not see any children asking for donations to UNICEF, which was prevalent during my Trick-or-Treating days in the 1960s, I did find a UNICEF report about the mental health of children around the world–children effected by lockdowns and other results of the COVID-19 Pandemic. The report, published in October of 2021, is called Life in Lockdown.

Here is a statement by Manasi Sharma, a research consultant with UNICEF who worked on the report:

“Government-imposed lockdowns, school closures, and disruption of services (including mental health care) have led to increased reports of fear and stress, anxiety, depression, anger, irritability, inattention, alcohol/substance, along with irregular physical activity and sleep patterns.”

As a nursery teacher, I have seen an increase in anxious behavior in the smallest of saints. There are more children who cry—and cry a little longer and louder–when they are dropped off.  In response, we have increased the ratio of nursery teacher to children to a 1:2 ratio. Several women who are experienced grandmothers in our ward have offered to come in and cuddle these children to help them make the transition into nursery.

Children who are 18 months old have only known a world operating with mitigating practices in place. Even the children who are the oldest ones in nursery have stronger memories of pandemic life than the mere months of life that they experienced before March of 2020.

One of my sisters teaches second grade, and she has made similar observations. She is working to help these schoolchildren get caught up while also increasing her expression of affection and admiration for them. She is challenging them to focus and get to work—but these challenges are made with a lot of support and compassion.

Whether we interact with children at work, church, in homes, or in brief interaction in stores and other public places, we are always invited to minister to children while conveying the unconditional love of our Savior.

I have my own burdens made more severe by the pandemic, and my natural response is to hoard attention and resources as salve for my own wounds. However, I understand that I can place my burdens before the Lord so that I can do my best to use some of my time, attention, and resources to serve others, particularly the children in nursery.

While I only spend 45 minutes focused on these children and their needs, I cannot imagine how challenging this is—helping children in distress–for schoolteachers, daycare workers, pediatric nurses, etc. to help children for eight or more hours a day. And then there are parents, some of whom have been nurturing young children in isolated conditions for 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Many of these adults are also experiencing trauma due to the pandemic, so we need to offer these parents as well as the workers support. Each person needs to decide how best to loan this support.

October 1992, Sis. Michaelene P. Grassli, General Primary President (1988-1994) delivered a conference talk entitled, “Behold Your Little Ones.”

As we minister to children with the same devotion and commitment demonstrated by the Savior, we bless them with love, security, faith, testimony, and the courage to resist evil. These are preventive measures that will help stem the raging tide of today’s epidemic immorality. The gospel can, and must, become a way of life for them today. Imagine what tomorrow’s Church could be like if we fulfill the needs of our children today. Imagine what it will be like if we don’t.

Even though Sis. Grassli was using the word “epidemic” metaphorically, children have experienced several hardships that have made adults buckle at the knees—and these children have fewer resources to help them meet the challenges. We adults need to move heaven and earth to help children heal and to help them gain some of the knowledge they need to grow academically, emotionally, and to wax “strong in spirit, filled with wisdom: and the grace of God [be upon them]” (Luke 2:40).